Kansas City at Twins. Twins 3, Landed Gentry 2.
Poor Mike Sweeney.
I mean, there are so many reasons you could say that, but tonight because he hit a sure double off Johan Santana with two outs in the eighth, and when you're a Royal there's very little reason to get out bed in the morning, and that's the sort of thing that the next day you could say, "Well, hell, I got a double off Johan Santana, I guess today I can get up and face the world, at least for a few hours," and that, when you are a member of the Kansas City Landed Gentry, is something worth fighting for.
But no. Alas. For there are forces in this world we must reckon with, and some of them are small forces that don't even have their own orbit, but that doesn't mean they're not mighty in their own way, that doesn't mean that when Mike Sweeney hits a double down the third base line that force isn't going to tumble around for awhile, gobble up that ball (and in the good sense, not in the Jimmy "Gobble" Gobble sense) and, sounding its barbaric yawp over the roofs of the world, send it hurling through space to beat out Mike Sweeney by a step. And if you were Mike Sweeney you might then jump up and down a little bit, you might tense your muscles into a little ball, you might even drop an F-Bomb or two (and not in the good sense) because you've just had your whole reason for getting up the next day thwarted by something that's not even a full-fledged planet anymore, but a dwarf planet, which is just so patronizing, I mean they couldn't have come up with a new name, they had to simple add some kind of diminutive that means the thing is sub, lesser, unworthy, while still containing the word "planet" as a constant mocking reminder of the glory that once was? That's who took away your reason to live?
Okay, I mean, we shouldn’t pick on Mike Sweeney, the poor dear's suffered enough. It's just Batgirl isn't herself. The truth is, Batgirl hates playing the Royals. Two of the most painful games in the past two seasons have been against them, and we weren't even at .500 against them when this series started, and every time you lose to the Royals a little piece of you dies, and we only have so many pieces left, you know? We did live through last year, after all. See, you feel like it's supposed to be easy, and then it's not, and then by the third inning if you're not ahead you're like OH MY GOD WHAT IF WE LOSE TO THE ROYALS and then all your muscles get tensed up and you begin sweating and cramping and speaking in tongues and it's damned hard to play baseball that way (Just ask Jason Giambi.) and the next thing you know you can't get out of bed in the morning, because people will know, they'll see the shame on your face, they'll point and laugh and say you lost to the Royals! and you'll say I know! I know! SHUT UP! I HATE YOU! and then there will be this whole shame spiral thing and really, it's better to just stay in bed.
So Batgirl would like to humbly suggest we spend the next two games getting about 10 run leads by the third inning, and everyone can pad their offensive stats and Batgirl will be happy, and then of course everyone's happy, except Mike Sweeney who will be sad, but, you know, that's pretty much going to happen anyway.
BatNotes: It's killing Batgirl that she can't go to the game on Thursday and cheer on Bradke. Please, go for her. Bring your signs and stand and cheer your heads off when he takes the mound, and when they take him out, whether in triumph or with one less arm, stand and cheer for him again.
Quick BatLinks:: From the Times: In Wacky Season, Twins Rely on Pitcher with Screwball Name. Third Base Line's got some pictures of the celebration. Jesse doesn't seem to like Esteban German, Mr. Baseball sings the praises of Bart, and Aaron documents el Presidente's achievements. Check out Viva Rivas's Rivas of the Day, and Thank You Brian Sabean's celebration of another Sabean Special. And if you're not following games with Pulling a Blyleven, your life is empty.
Also, new in the BatStore:
That's "You Can't Handle the Boof," which Batgirl and Jeb are going to learn a lot about next year, tagline courtesy of Adidasman. Click on the BatKitty to the left to visit the BatStore.
To your "Oof." may I add "Da."?
Returned from the game this evening feeling very relieved. The Royals tend to strike fear in my heart. When we least expect it , they've been able to take a game from us. I just so want us to keep winning for the next . . . oh . . . how's from now until I die sound? Too greedy? Not at all Minnesota Nice? Tough. That's what I want.
Posted by: Beth at September 26, 2006 10:54 PMOh, Batgirl. I'm pretty sure that Joe Nathan (love his though I do, very much) is going to give me an ulcer. Keep in mind I'm 22 and, if anything should be giving me an ulcer it should be my employment status, not the Nathanest of Joes.
Posted by: TwinsKiz at September 26, 2006 11:14 PMBatgirl, I still think that game in fenway last year when torii injured his ankle was the #1 most painful game to watch, not just because of torii, but that awful awful 3 error run scored by johnny demon.
PS. I think the cub rookies outdid the twin rookies this year. Lots of padding all around.
I get to explain to a bunch of 7th graders tomorrow the reason behind Pluto's demotion. It makes sense... it really does. A little piece inside of me died, though, when it's planet status was stripped away. For 20 years of my life it's been a planet and then *poof* (no, not Boof) there were only 8 planets.
I'm glad we could beat KC tonight. TwinsKiz, I also wonder whether I'm going to get an ulcer from watching Twitchy. Full count with 2 outs and loaded bases... eeek.
Posted by: Shelley at September 26, 2006 11:41 PMMaybe it was the dome dog...maybe the hangover but for a lot of the game tonight (which I was lucky enough to attend again!), but my stomach wouldn't settle down all night until I thought about it and looked at the scoreboard and lo and behold we are losing to the Gosh-Darned Royals...then LEEEEWWWWWWWWW! struck mightily and said "Take that Odalis Perez...you have just been lit up like a purple light saber" And hope resurfaced that the night will not end in utter disaster...Other highlights included NBP with 3 singles and El Presidente making up for the silly error in his last start with four superb fielding assists. The only bad part of the night was when I exited the dome knowing I won't return in person until 2007. Show up in force, Twins fans, for Radke because he is cut from a different cloth...the old school...just give me the damn ball. Don't look now but obviously we are only one game behind Detroit for the central but also only 1 game behind the Evil Empire for the #1 seed and homefield throughout the playoffs...keep humping away boys!
Posted by: Ross at September 26, 2006 11:57 PMnot sure if this made the Bat-rounds yet, but it was in my email earlier. Still grinning like an idiot.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=IVcju97G158
Posted by: TD at September 27, 2006 01:43 AMWhaaaat? They changed the NY Times article title. It's now "Boof? Twins Know What It Means."
Weird. Oh well, got a good picture up of him anyway.
Posted by: MNPundit at September 27, 2006 02:06 AMTD, excellent video. Great way to start the day!
Posted by: Pun at September 27, 2006 05:41 AMHey Joe - again - really -no need to make it THAT interesting in the 9th =)
Did anyone see the KARE11 Extra last night - it was about how annoying AJ can be- maybe they have the feature up on their website??
And is La Velle E Neal a bat-girl reader??
Or did I miss something?
http://www.startribune.com/509/story/703533.html
Much Love
Wonder Woman
PS - Brad do not lose an arm tomorrow -please
Posted by: Wonder Woman at September 27, 2006 08:22 AMSome Twins Love =)
http://sportsillustrated.cnn.com/2006/writers/albert_chen/09/26/awards.picks/index.html?cnn=yes
WW
Posted by: Wonder Woman at September 27, 2006 08:23 AMWe may have sweated out this win, but it's a win, and it's all very helpful for me right now - I had to say goodbye to one of my batkitties (the day after my birthday no less) a week ago, and the Twins surging into the playoffs has given me a welcome and happy distraction.
Posted by: Cathy at September 27, 2006 08:24 AMJoe Nathan making it through that inning without a run scoring was nothing short of incredible. He owes me blood pressure medication.
Wee Sister and I are going to be there Thursday night--her solely to cheer on Bradke (I mean, she loves the Twins, but she does have to get up super-early for work, so usually doesn't attend non-weekend games). There was no chance I was going to miss it.
Posted by: JustBeth at September 27, 2006 08:29 AMI recommend watching the highlight reel video at the start of every day. More than once, if necessary. Does that make me crazy? Prob-ab-ly.
It looks like Google is having its own version of Cupcake Day (see www.google.com).
I mention this mostly because it occurred to me that the Twins started their Just-incredible run only a few days after the *real* Cupcake Day (06/06/06). (I suspect a brief cupcake digestion period was necessary) and they then later clinched a playoff spot against a starting pitcher (Horehay Man of Wax) who came into the game with an ERA of 6.66. Coincidence? I think not. Good (and the Twins are very, very good) *always* conquers evil (empires and all, but that is for another day).
Posted by: Franorama at September 27, 2006 08:34 AMI was wondering if Joe loaded the bases on purpose just to practice for the playoffs should he get in that position. LOL
Posted by: Nora at September 27, 2006 08:37 AMBeth,
Please give Bradke an extra loud holler for me. The older I get, the more I appreciate how amazing these "boys of summer" are. Please ask Brad to save some of his arm for the series--even if he has to start pitching with the other one.
BG--I like your 10 run lead idea. Would help me grow out the old fingernails. As much as I love the VP, he had me contemplating the toenails last night.
Posted by: Sandee at September 27, 2006 08:42 AMI'm not sure if this is the best place for this, but I saw none better, so...
I just wanted to say Congratulations to the Twins for their unreal season. With the injuries, and what appeared to be a lackluster lineup going into the season (and a horrible start), you guys came back with a vengeance. You scrapped and hit and pitched, and you won. And now, I'll be rooting for the ALC teams in the playoffs.
Despite you being our mortal enemies, there were only two things that bothered me. One, was whomever on your team said that they really wanted to see ANYONE other than the Sox make the playoffs. I detect some bitchiness there. The other was the fans incessently booing AJ - I still don't get that.
But all that aside, I like the way the Twins play ball, and I love this site. Good luck in the postseason. We'll definitely be seeing you next year.
I keep going to the standings page on ESPN just to look at that beautiful little "z" next to Minnesota and hoping that somehow it will become an "x" or maybe even a "*"...
C'mon boys! (But please be careful and don't pull, strain, stretch, bruise or even bump anything.)
Posted by: Moe at September 27, 2006 09:14 AMThanks for that, Sox Matt. You are very kind. It was Justin Morneau who made that comment about not wanting to see Chicago make the playoffs - but come now. You might be an expert on bitchiness, based on your allegiance to said White Sox, but I hardly think you'd hear anything too different from the rank and file on your team were the situation reversed. (See "Buerhle, Mark".) The heated rivalry between the teams is fun; why would you want to quell that? As for A.J., we've all talked about this already, and we've decided (well, most of us have) your catcher likes to be booed, and goes out of his way to encite such reactions. He's a jerk, he loves being a jerk, he was a jerk when he played for the Twins. He'd be disappointed if he wasn't booed lustily in every road city he plays in, I'd guess. All that notwithstanding, we will surely see your boys in full force again next year - that much is certain. Until then, though, we have a world championship to win; chat with you later.
Posted by: adidasman at September 27, 2006 09:29 AM"See, you feel like it's supposed to be easy, and then it's not, and then by the third inning if you're not ahead you're like OH MY GOD WHAT IF WE LOSE TO THE ROYALS"
I laughed out loud when I read this part, because IT'S SO TRUE.
Posted by: Salt-Man Z at September 27, 2006 09:41 AM"Batgirl, I still think that game in fenway last year when torii injured his ankle was the #1 most painful game to watch, not just because of torii, but that awful awful 3 error run scored by johnny demon.
Posted by: gina at September 26, 2006 11:16 PM"
yes, and also because of JC Frickin' Romero giving up a grand slam to Jon Olerud!!! GAH! JC Romero, I shake my fist at you!
Posted by: kafumbly at September 27, 2006 10:08 AMYeah, playing the Royals is like that test you've been told will be a piece of cake, so you don't study or prepare in any way because you're really smart and you know all this stuff and you're gonna finish in 37 seconds and then go out for a bite to eat, then when you actually sit down to take it you read the first two or three questions and you have no clue as to the answers, and you look around the room to see if anyone else is seizing up in panic, and you think, "Oh, my goodness, I'm going to flunk this test and I'll fail the class and be kicked out of school and I'll end up with no valid career path and I'll be forced to work the drive-through at White Castle just to keep the heat on and I'll grow old and die and I'll be one of those people whose neighbor notices a stench wafting under the door three weeks after I've expired and that'll be the only way anyone even notices I'm gone." Except sometimes you calm down and realize you really do know the answers, and you pass the test and go on to have 2.4 kids and a wife and a nice house and a job and a lovely funeral with flowers and people weeping. Like last night.
Posted by: adidasman at September 27, 2006 10:16 AMDear Batgirl,
Mrs. Twayn would like to know if 'You Can't Handle the Boof' attire will be available in adult sizes as well.
Hopefully,
Twayn
I'm going on Thursday. It's going to rock.
Posted by: KanedaX at September 27, 2006 11:16 AMI second Mrs. Twayn. I'd love to get one.
Also, I will go on Thursday and I will cheer until my voice falls off and I need to fish glue it back on, because Bradke is worth it.
Posted by: HooliganKat at September 27, 2006 11:26 AMDear Mr. and Mrs. Twayn and Ms. Kat,
Batgirl shall make those tonight.
Sincerely,
Batgirl
Oops. That's Batgirl.
Posted by: Batgirl at September 27, 2006 11:32 AMFranorama--
"I think you're crazy.... Just like meeeheeee-eeee" ;) -- Oh, it's bookmarked. *nods*
So, they told me Bradke was pitching on Sunday, so I got a ticket to Sunday's game. Now Bradke's pitching on Thursday instead?!? GAH! I can't really fit another game into my schedule. Crud.
Dear Batgirl,
I too shall be there for Bradke on Thursday night.
Is there anything in particular you would like to see on a sign for him?
bubblemint
Posted by: bubblemint at September 27, 2006 12:47 PMAnybody know of any upcoming Twins games on ESPN? I reeeeally want to watch a game and not have to deal with horrific/unreliable wireless internet. Perhaps they will be on Thursday night baseball and I'll get to watch Bradke pitch. That would make my night.
Posted by: Shelley at September 27, 2006 01:24 PMI too noticed the extra prominent use of the word "hubris" in LEN III's article today, then a couple of paragraphs later, he slipped in "batling".
Posted by: Tony Boliva at September 27, 2006 02:07 PMI just read this article about Bradke and almost started to cry..
http://www.twincities.com/mld/twincities/sports/15617175.htm
COME ON, BRAD!!!! WE ALL LOVE YOU!!! And Bat-Girl, at least you can watch the game...! I can't afford me no cable or MLB extra innings.
...Brad deserves to go out with a BANG!!!!
Posted by: Elle at September 27, 2006 02:16 PMI just read this article about Bradke and almost started to cry..
http://www.twincities.com/mld/twincities/sports/15617175.htm
COME ON, BRAD!!!! WE ALL LOVE YOU!!! And Bat-Girl, at least you can watch the game...! I can't afford me no cable or MLB extra innings.
...Brad deserves to go out with a BANG!!!!
Posted by: Elle at September 27, 2006 02:16 PMThat article about Brad Radke is the most heartfelt story.
I wish Brad the very best and want him to know not only does his team appreciate what he does and love him, but the whole state of Minnesota does too.
I know I'll be giving him a well deserved Standing O from my dorm, no matter what the outcome.
He's a true baseball player.
Posted by: Megan at September 27, 2006 02:25 PMAll these years, and I've always felt this overwhelming appreciation for Brad Radke - something inexplicable about the way he goes about his business on the mound, an intensity beneath the unflappable facade. And now I know why. I wish I could be in Minneapolis tomorrow evening - but I'll be hanging on every pitch, hopig Brad can keep that right arm glued on long enough to get him into the playoff rotation. Come on, Brad - you can do it. I know you can. We all do.
Posted by: adidasman at September 27, 2006 02:28 PMI'd like to chime in with the AJ thing and say that's just the deal with AJ. He loves to incite the enemy crowd. It's nothing personal at least not for me, just an expression of competitiveness that AJ shares. At lteast that's how I see it.
Posted by: MNPundit at September 27, 2006 02:40 PMTD - thanks for the link to the Highlight Reel. I had to work that night, so the hubby had taped the final inning and most of the celebration for me, but it cut out right in the middle of the highlight reel. Argh!
Sandee - your holler for Brad shall be duly delivered.
Posted by: Beth at September 27, 2006 02:45 PMShelley,
Unfortunately, none of the Twins' remaining regular season games will be on ESPN. The Tigers game will be featured on ESPN Thursday night. Also of note, Saturday's Twins game, which starts at 11:10 a.m. due to a double booking at the Dome, is not on the TV schedule for FSN. You would think that the next-to-last game of the season against the defending World Series champions, the central game in a series that only one month ago held significant playoff implications, would warrant local television coverage, but FSN programming mavens apparently avoid thinking as if it were death or public speaking. Ah, well, I've rather neglected Gordo and Dazzle this year, so I'll spend a few hours with them on Saturday.
Dearest Batgirl,
I will most definately be at the Dome tomorrow night to cheer my head off for Sir Radke and I'm also trying to make a sign for him. So far I can't think of anything to say that encompasses everything I'd like to say to him. Any suggestions?
In Need Of Help,
TwinsKiz
I'll always appreciate the great baseball from AJ when he was a Twin, and his loyalty to the team, all the way to his last days, as well as the fine pitchers we got due to the great baseball when AJ was a Twin. I loved his bad boy attitude when he was one of us; it was like having a tough guy for a friend. I will never be able to boo him, and it will always hurt me to hear Twins fans boo him.
However, I am sympathetic to the people who think AJ's a creep. In the ESPN article about him earlier in the summer, someone from the Giants described AJ as "relentlessly negative." In the article AJ lamely tried to squirm out of the nut kneeing incident. One of the White Sox said jokingly, but correctly from what I understand, "AJ's not a smart ass. He's an ass, without the smart."
Posted by: nailbiter at September 27, 2006 04:36 PMI'm with you on the ulcer, TwinsKiz. Last night echoed the Chicago series when Jermaine Dye blew Nathan's save and I hate to watch the rest of the game on mute.
Posted by: Erin at September 27, 2006 04:51 PMThe last of our flex 40 tickets have been spent on 3 tickets to see Bradke pitch. The ovation will be worth the price of admission.
Posted by: PJStP at September 27, 2006 07:47 PMI am so. there. tonight. I can't tell you how excited I was when I heard he was starting tonight - ol' Brad may have irritated me the past couple of seasons, but I am really glad that I will be able to see his last regular season start. He was so good for so many years, how can you not appreciate that? A tear or three may be shed tonight, I will admit it.
Posted by: FH at September 28, 2006 08:03 AMAlso, from that Times article on Boof:
"Boof, of course, rhymes with poof, which is what many Twins fans figured the team’s playoff chances went once Liriano left an Aug. 7 start in Detroit with elbow pain."
I beg to differ: that's what everybody BUT Twins fans thought. We knew they could pull it off without Liriano, as they had been during much of August. Just because ESPN figured we were dead in the water didn't mean we agreed, Mr. Borzi.
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