This entry posted by Twayn, who thinks he is a Compatibilist, therefore he is.
Baltimore at Twins. Twins 3, Orioles 2.
So the game is getting started and I turn on the TV and settle down on the couch, because I’m not the kind of guy who would own a divan, you know, because I don’t have a parlor or drawing room to put the thing in and even if I did have a divan I’d call it a couch anyway. I don’t have a foyer, either, but you don’t even want to hear that story. Then my wife brings me a grilled chicken sandwich with bacon and swiss cheese smothered with Sweet Baby Rays (The Sauce Is The Boss®), some Fritos on the side, and a cold Dr. Pepper. Life is good. And then the children pass through, debating philosophy on their way to the kitchen.
“You always get everything just because you were first! You're such a Primarian,” the Younger says to the Elder.
"Don't be so Ancillary. You get just as much as I do because you’re new and people think that’s cute,” responds the Elder to the Younger.
And then it strikes me. I’m following the headliner. After all the hype, after all the waiting, after five miserable, exquisite months of anticipation, Opening Day is over, and the magic lingers only in memory and the archives now and today is just another day in a grueling 162-game schedule.
But it’s a new day, with a new game, and that’s a cute little bit of magic in its own way, and there’s still that new season feel, it’s still our first turn through the rotation, and tonight we found out that, for the most part, the Orioles can not handle the Boof. Only a certain Aubrey L. Huff, late of the Astros and Rays, a native of the great city of Marion, Ohio could actually be said to handle the Boof. Oh, and Melvin Mora. But that’s all, just them. Just those two. And that damn Markakis. But nobody else. That’s it. Just Huff and Mora and Markakis. Except for a few walks, it was a Bradkelike 6IP, 3H, 2ER, 1HR, 6K, a quality start first heralded when Dick Bremer announced in the middle of the first that “the Boof is on fire.” I’d swear I’ve heard that somewhere before.
But on the other side of the hill, a certain Daniel Cabrera was pretty much on fire, too, even after a certain Luis Castillo played a little pinball with his countryman's leg to lead off the first inning. Cabrera can pitch, as he showed tonight, but I don’t see any gold gloves in his future. A few head bumps on low doorways, yes, but no gold gloves.
It was a good game, a close game, just another game in a long 162-game season, with 160 still to go. But it was a Twins game with a Twins quality and a Twins feel. It had good starting pitching, a timely seeing eye grounder by a diminutive infielder, two-for-four performances by Castillo and the Chairman, an urgent bloop single to take the leadership in late innings, a strong bullpen showing with a win and a save, and the ugliest stolen base in the history of piranhas by Jason Tyner, one of five for the team on the night.
So the season and the Twins are off and running, except for Rondell White, who suddenly has an uncharacteristic affinity for walking and who, according to Dick Bremer in the fifth inning, believes that life is scripted, that all of our actions are pre-ordained. Which is why he was able be make that amazing catch on Opening Day and be the first number-one web gem of the season, and why, ergo, Cuddyer will certainly not strike out this much all year long, and which also makes Rondell a Determinist, reminding me that my children are still in the kitchen talking philosophy and it’s way past their bedtime, and I’m still sitting here blogging on my divan. I mean my couch.
Note from RD: Twins bloggers are playing host to a meet-up Saturday afternoon at Buffalo Wild Wings in Crystal. We’ll gather starting at 2:45 p.m. for the Twins-White Sox game. This B-Dubs is at 5590 W. Broadway, the corner of Broadway and Bass Lake Road in the Crystal Shopping Center. Come join us. It’ll give us an excuse to do a few more during the season. And, really, we don’t have to meet in Crystal every time.
Crystal actually kind of works for me, and I hope to use this conference with Twins bloggers to bring up a growing concern I have, a disturbing trend I've noted which may seriously affect the team down the road. I know they're 2-0, and everybody wants to be positive for now, but why don't I just point out the elephant in the room?
The fact is that Nick Punto is often *still clean* as late as the third, nay, even the *fourth* inning. We noted this with heavy hearts in the home opener, that his shirt was as white and unsullied as freshly fallen snow until what his *third* at-bat. I observed the same thing again yesterday, on television. There was LNP, in the middle innings, looking like the "after" shot in a laundry detergent commercial. Most unsettling.
I know it's early in the season, and perhaps the kid just hasn't tapped all the rust off, but I feel it's an issue our little Twins blogosphere should be wringing its collective hands over, speculating about wildly, and turning into stats that portend doom.
Posted by: Kurtis at April 4, 2007 06:09 AMKurtis, it's hard (even for Punto) to dirty a uniform when taking strike three, which is a bad habit he's gotten into this year.
Posted by: Rhubarb_Runner at April 4, 2007 08:10 AMLNP has been the subject of some offseason and early-season derision from those restless fans who believe a regular third baseman should have more boom in his bat.
I'm thinking he's taken that criticism to heart and is trying to keep up with the Morneaus and Cuddyers and such, when what he really needs to do is (re-) embrace his inner piran(h/t)a.
Posted by: Franorama at April 4, 2007 08:30 AMAs ugly as it was, I found Tyner's stolen base to be one of the most humorous moments in my baseball memory. It was even funnier watching the dugout laughing well after Tyner had scored.
Posted by: hossengopper at April 4, 2007 08:52 AMWe'll see, but I think Punto's awkward swings had more to do with Cabrera than a desire to become a shark.
That said, here's a good morning treat; The Hold Steady's version of "Take Me Out To The Ballgame", with a new verse for the Twins, can be downloaded at: http://www.myspace.com/theholdsteady
Posted by: popomo at April 4, 2007 08:54 AMWhat made Tyner's crawl into 2nd base even funnier was that the throw was so late and so far to the shortstop side of the bag that the play wasn't even close. Carbrera wasn't laughing, but everyone else was.
Some college kid out in Los Angeles has started up a Twins blog, hoping to compete in a crowded and well-respected field. It's actually pretty good. Check it out at "Twinkiesofftheshelf@blogspot.com"
OK, full disclosure: I'm her dad.
Posted by: Jim H. at April 4, 2007 09:19 AMHas DB inadvertantly sparked the next great stadium chant? "The Boof! The Boof! The Boof is on Fire!"
He shall contribute to society, after all.
Best. Stolen. Base. Ever.
Well, at least the *funniest* one ever...
The address for that site is actually:
http://twinkiesofftheshelf.blogspot.com/
Posted by: bc twins fan at April 4, 2007 10:07 AMSee, I don't believe LNP's sudden cleanliness is not due to lack of effort. I'm not sure if anyone else saw this, but on Monday night when the ball bounced off the catcher's mitt and Castillo came home to score there was a brief shot towards the Twins dugout. Suddenly there was a Twins player flying OVER third base. I deduced that this had to be LNP, tiny superhero and that he was only trying to sully his uniform. Maybe someone replaced his uniform with dirt-proof garments to try to ruin the Twins' mojo.
Posted by: Saajak at April 4, 2007 10:44 AMNot to pick too much on the tiny super hero because a lot of guys were getting wrung up on called third strikes on(?) the inside corner last night. As for him staying relatively clean-clothed, didn't anyone else notice him sliding FEET FIRST in to 3rd base???
Personally, I think aliens (or BitchSox impersonating aliens) have abducted LNP and replaced him with an imposter.
Posted by: JimCrikket at April 4, 2007 10:50 AM>Has DB inadvertantly sparked the next great stadium chant? "The Boof! The Boof! The Boof is on Fire!"<
That wordplay was gaining popularity late last season and has carried over. I don't think Dick Bremer was the first person to apply it as a Bonser reference.
However, Bert probably could lead the next line of the chant, as he has some previous experience with forms of the terminology it includes.
Posted by: Franorama at April 4, 2007 11:16 AM"As for him staying relatively clean-clothed, didn't anyone else notice him sliding FEET FIRST in to 3rd base???"
How about, did anyone see Rondell White slide FEET FIRST into first base?? Haha, not sure I had ever seen that before.
Posted by: Megan at April 4, 2007 11:34 AM162-0, you heard it first here!
Posted by: DTB at April 4, 2007 11:42 AMBest ever quote from LNP (talking about Cabrera, as seen in this morning's addition of the Strib): "He's mine. I've said for a long time that Daniel Cabrera has my number more than any starting pitcher we face. This has to be the third or fourth game that he's struck me out three times."
Love that guy.
Posted by: TwinsPrincess at April 4, 2007 12:01 PMDoes anyone have a video clip of the Tyner slide from last night? I was listening to the radio and would love to see video footage of it if it's posted anywhere...
Posted by: Beth at April 4, 2007 12:05 PMBoy could I go for one of those sandwiches. The sauce is indeed boss
Posted by: Matt at April 4, 2007 12:49 PMI'll bet it is, but just reading about Twayn's dinner made my GERD flair up.
Posted by: Kurtis at April 4, 2007 01:46 PMI don't even know where Crystal is.
Posted by: Frosty at April 4, 2007 02:16 PMI wish I could meet up with y'all, whether in Crystal or elsewhere, but it's another month before I have any free weekend time... just do it again will ya!
Posted by: CapitalBabs at April 4, 2007 02:22 PM
How to get to B-Dubs in Crystal:
Hwy. 100 to 42nd Ave. N.
west on 42nd Ave. to Douglas Drive
right on Douglas Dr. to Broadway (T-intersection)
left on Broadway about 3 blocks to B-Dubs (on the right).
If people show up, we'll do it again. Promise.
Is everyone seeing the story about the Vice Prez on ESPN?
Apparently he is going to be at the hospital tonight with his wife expecting any time now, and will come to the game if needed from the hospital.
They are making a pretty big deal about it.
Posted by: Eric at April 4, 2007 04:25 PMAnyone just see J.D. Durbin get lit up by the Rockies. Giving up 8 runs in 2/3 of an inning? I guess the Twins made the right decision not putting him on their 25-man roster. Let Arizona deal with that.
Posted by: Richard at April 4, 2007 04:51 PMI'm going to be attending the game on Saturday here in Chicago--anyone have any witty ideas for a sign that won't get me killed by the Chicago faithful? I do enjoy the thrill of taking my life into my own hands, but only to an extent......leave ideas!
Posted by: Twins4life at April 4, 2007 05:10 PM"Is everyone seeing the story about the Vice Prez on ESPN?
Apparently he is going to be at the hospital tonight with his wife expecting any time now, and will come to the game if needed from the hospital.
They are making a pretty big deal about it."
They made a big deal about when Santana came over to pitch right after his little baby was born as well. Nathan's wife is being induced and I'm sure they are hoping that the baby will have already arrived by the time Nathan would need to get to the park. I have a feeling that if things are "imminent", he won't be leaving to go pitch...
Posted by: CapitalBabs at April 4, 2007 05:27 PMHere's something fun: "Leon Trotsky Previews The Upcoming Baseball Season" http://www.sfist.com/archives/2007/04/04/leon_trotsky_previews_the_upcoming_baseball_season.php
His prediction for the Twins is first in the AL Central, "small market team who uses brains to beat moneyed interests"
No quotes from Chairman Mauer, though.
Posted by: popomo at April 4, 2007 05:57 PMI think our worries about the VP being available tonight are moot. I heard on the radio on the way home that the Nathan's have already had their little girl. Welcome to the team, Riley.
Posted by: twayn at April 4, 2007 05:58 PMWe were at the Angels game last night. The Australian Crawl baserunning maneuver made the "Around the Leagues" highlights video, to the audible appreciation of 40,000 people.
The, um, awkward run at home by Barry Bonds did not make the highlights.
Posted by: Robbster at April 4, 2007 07:04 PMjoe nathan is the sole reason I am not in last place in my fantasy league right now
Posted by: sh at April 4, 2007 07:05 PMHey DTB! I predicted 162-0 last night! Meet me in the parking lot. :-P
Posted by: Bring Back Reboulet at April 4, 2007 09:22 PMCongratulations Joe (N).
Good game so far, it doesn't look like the veep will be needed.
PS I am writeing all of this with one hand, as the other one in holding the radio in the only place where I get 1500 (it's in the air).
Go Twins!!!
Wow, you lose a WS to the Bitches, and even Tolsoy can't remember there's a team in Houston.
Posted by: Piranhtachew at April 5, 2007 01:46 AMAnd I forget to spell "Trotsky". :P
(Will try to make it Saturday.)
Perhaps Mr. Fuzzles will need to save Tiny Superhero
this year!