You need to start a Corky (Corky) Miller hit watch. I mean, the guy is 1 for his last 51 for crying out loud!

Maybe Sweetcheeks is just too obvious a choice?

I'm going to have to start fightin' for the good Doctor I guess.

I plan to order a shirt in a few weeks... After payday! Until then, I need to decide who my boyfriend will be! Such difficult choices!

I just purchased my Matthew LeCroy mancrush shirt. Thanks, Batgirl!

Nothing to do with bf or nsmc.....

But MLB looks like they are offering a way to have blogs about baseball linked from MLB.com. Maybe Batgirl can link and that might help her get free swag.

http://mlb.mlb.com/NASApp/mlb/mlb/news/blogs/index.jsp

If I had swag, I would give it all to BG

Is the Big LeRoy man-crush shirt cut for extra girth? If so, I may just need to get me one of those.

And to borrow a comment from HooliganKat, maybe we should consider some "Free Tiffee" shirts? Anyone else think that might be a worthwhile endeavor?

I would definitely buy a "Free Tiffee" shirt.

Darn. Bartlett is my BF-in-waiting, but the fact that the LNP shirt actually says LNP is too good.

No other shirts have nicknames, but I can actually remember everyone else's REAL name. I can't just say Nick Punto. My friends look at my like I'm crazy when I start talking about this Little Nicky So-and-So person.

Dearest Mr. AA,

The shirts are big and you would have no trouble fitting into an XL. Matt LeCroy himself could fit into an XL.

LNP isn't his real name?

Love,
BG

Hooligan and double-a, I would totally get behind that one...

Yes, I also love the "Free Tiffee" campaign. In art class today, I drew a picture of the Twins field during the boring lecture, and had Mr. Tiffee behind bars (aka, Rochester). Fun stuff.

Stacy,
Are there any plans to share that artwork with the rest of us? I would love to see it!

Bat-Girl
I need your help. I can no longer enjoy Twins baseball with the stadium deal ominously looming in the legislature. I truly feel that this is our last chance to keep the Twins and everytime I flip on the game, I can't focus on my boys and what they need to do to win, I focus on what it will be like when they are gone. Please, promise me that you will sound the bat horn and assemble the Battlings when the time comes and we need their support. For, I really need to put this stadium thing behind us before I can partake in the collective ravings considering Punto, Rivas, and Corkless. help help help!

I love the idea of a Free Tiffee shirt, but at the same time I'm optimistic that the situation will resolve itself soon enough, and the shirts will no longer be necessary.

So "Corky" is out of options, and if they send him back to AAA they might lose him; boo freakin' hoo.

Wohoooo!! A Little Nicky Punto shirt!!
That so made my Friday!!!

Thank you Batgirl!!

Much Love
Wonder Woman

ndtf,

Sure, I'll scan it and give y'all a link when I get home from work tonight.

Personally, I'm holding out for what I hope is the inevitable "Bat-Girl Is My Girl Friend" version. Any time soon?

My quick 'n' dirty Photoshop: http://adamschneider.net/misc/free_tiffee.jpg
(Or click my name)

Feel free to print and take to the 'Dome tonight!

An FYI: according to MLB.com, Corky Miller is a career .193 hitter through yesterday. Can someone explain again to me why losing this guy could be a bad thing?

I'd buy two Batgirl is my g/f shirts, one for me, and one for my 17 year ols son. Then we could spread the BG gospel throughout Southern California

Scotty, I don't think anyone can. Hopefully NBP will be feeling better soon and they can ditch Corky in favor of Tiffee.

Nice work, Adam! I like it! I'm looking forward to seeing Stacy's artwork, too.

Punto-sized: http://adamschneider.net/misc/free_tiffee_small.jpg

LeRoy-sized PDF: http://adamschneider.net/misc/free_tiffee.pdf (463K)

Dearest Batlings,

Batgirl's modesty would never permit her to do such a thing, and Jeb might as frown as well. Though she is deeply flattered.

Love,
BG

Adam,

as I am sitting in the upper deck tonight, I shall not bring the sign to this game. however, on Sunday I will be in the SECOND ROW (well, fourth) slightly to the right of home plate and on the third base line (yes, I like to keep bringing this up), in view of Gardy and the dugout, so I shall bring your lovely sign with me on Sunday!

sincerely,

kafumbly

I had a choice between TC and Cuddy. The Bigger bear won out. How come TC is not on the chart? I'd take a Cuddy too in a color other than white. That's why Dr. is in the lead with his many color options.

Off Topic, but I have a theory . . .

Ass-Bats are contageous . . .
Corky Miller is one for what, the decade . . .

Corky Miller is the Typhoid Mary of Ass-Bats.

(Free Tiffee)

If anyone really wants to brighten their day, check this out. Tell me, why is he still on the team?

http://minnesota.twins.mlb.com/NASApp/mlb/team/player.jsp?player_id=280061

Any Batlings going to the game tonight? 214 Represent!

Wow, 14 Ks in 51 ABs for C. "C". M. That's true ass-battage.

So what's up with Naked B.P., anyway?

Section 134, Row 20

I sure hope Lew's playing tonight, because I'm wearing his shirt.

I wish I could be there tonight, HooliganKat. Sadly, I fear that I have already attended my quota of games for the year (one). At least it was a good one and I got to see Johan sit some Bitch Sox Bitches down. I will be watching on TV, hoping to see some Free Tiffee signs.

I'm currently listening to Bill Werndl of the "Mighty 1090" out here in San Diego interview Joe Nathan. "The only guy hitting on your club is Jacque Jones..."
That was apparently a question. What an idiot. Yeah, that's the only guy hitting at all, you knothead. I knew there was a reason I quit listening to AM sports talk radio.

GO TWINS! I can't have us losing to the Angels again. It was intolerable after the playoff loss. There are almost as many Angels fans where I work here in San Diego as there are Padres fans. I did enjoy watching Santana mow down the LOS ANGELES ANGELS (their fans HATE that) last year in July. Good times.

Oooh! Oooh! I have a theory!

Gardy, too, wonders why the heck Corky "Corky" Miller is still on the team. He is deliberately putting him into the lineup in order to drum up a groundswell among Twins fans calling and emailing Terry Ryan to dump Corky. I mean, if he just left him on the bench, everyone might forget he was there until it was too late and they were down to only one bench player in an important game and Gardy would be forced to play Corky "Corky" Miller in a crucial situation.

What do you think?

Hey Miss Modesty,
How 'bout a compromise? What do think of "Bat-Girl Is My Non-sexual Woman Crush" instead? That would be easier on Jeb as well.

Normally I don't dig the mass email jokes that go around, but I do like this one I just got:

Two old men, Moe and Sam, have been friends all their lives. Sam is dying, and Moe comes to visit him every day.

"Sam," says Moe, "You know how we have both loved baseball all our lives, when you get to Heaven, somehow you've got to let me know if there's baseball in Heaven."

Sam looks up at Moe from his death bed, and says, "Moe anything for you.

And shortly after that, Sam passes on.

It is midnight a couple of nights later. Moe is sound asleep when he is awakened by a blinding flash of white light and a voice calls out to him, "Moe. ... Moe...."

"Who is it?" says Moe sitting up suddenly. "Who is it?"

"Sam? Is that you? Where are you?"

I'm in Heaven," says Sam, "and I've got to tell you, I've got really good news and a little bad news. The good news," says Sam, "is that there is baseball in Heaven, all our old buddies are there, we're all young men again and we can play baseball all we want, and we never get tired!"

"Really?" says Moe, "That is fantastic, but, what's the bad news?"

Sam says "You're pitching next Tuesday."

Dearest BG,

Can I please have the Joe Nathan is my boyfriend in the woman's ringer T instead of the men's?!?!

I so hate to ask for special treatment.. but the men's will be too big for me..

A couple comments about Corky.

1) Let's try thinking of him like the Royals. Deserving of our pity not our hatred.

2) Watch the highlight clip on the page link provided by ndtf (click on the TJ below) and listen to the announcers talk about Corky. Maybe someday that Corky will show up at the Dome.

Incidentally, if anyone is interested in attending any of the Dodger (June 10-12) or Angel (July 4-6) games out here this year, either from in the SoCal area or from out of town, let me know.

If anyone wants to travel up from San Diego, we can organize a carpool and/or decent contigent of fans to make some noise. There's nothing better than cheering loud for the Twins on the road, IMHO. Last year I had a great time screaming my head off for Jacque, who combined with Santana to beat the Angels all by himself.

If anyone is considering buying tickets to a dodgers-Twins game out here, DO NOT get suckered into buying tickets in Section FF, Row 30. They're obstructed view. It should pretty much be season-ticket holders, but I wouldn't be surprised if people tried to unload them for cheap on eBay, because they're pricey seats. Here's the LA Times article about it (subscription required):

http://www.latimes.com/sports/la-sp-plaschke27apr27,1,7712550.column

CB,

I'm with you on that one. I didn't want to ask cuz I'm new.

kafumbly

Incidentally, if anyone is interested in attending any of the Dodger (June 10-12) or Angel (July 4-6) games out here this year, either from in the SoCal area or from out of town, let me know.

If anyone wants to travel up from San Diego, we can organize a carpool and/or decent contigent of fans to make some noise. There's nothing better than cheering loud for the Twins on the road, IMHO. Last year I had a great time screaming my head off for Jacque, who combined with Santana to beat the Angels all by himself.

If anyone is considering buying tickets to a dodgers-Twins game out here, DO NOT get suckered into buying tickets in Section FF, Row 30. They're obstructed view. It should pretty much be season-ticket holders, but I wouldn't be surprised if people tried to unload them for cheap on eBay, because they're pricey seats. Here's the LA Times article about it (subscription required):

http://www.latimes.com/sports/la-sp-plaschke27
apr27,1,7712550.column

I don't give an ass-bat about Lew Ford, but I have to order the shirt to keep BG's kitties fed.

whoops. sorries for the double-post. the internets claimed it didn't work the first time. or the second, for that matter.

kafumbly... as soon as we get our shirts, we will have to find a chance to hook up and get a photo together to send to BG.. *GRIN*

Ironically, my boyfriend bought me the "Justin is my boyfriend" shirt. Now to figure out how to get the shirt signed. :)

I know a easy way to get things signed, although you need to be patient and you may have to try a couple times to get the one you want.

so what's your easy way Kat? always looking for ideas.

for sure, CB!

I'm getting antsy for tonight's game! I don't want to sit at work for another hour... argh! I'm attired in my Vice President jersey and my TC hat signed by Lex Lewford.

and I left the TV on for Tumbleweed so she can watch her boyfriend play 2nd base again. :)

(she likes noise during the day when I'm at work; it keeps her from getting stressed out. I may be nuts, but I'm not crazy. really.)

Wait for them after the game to leave the clubhouse. I got a ton of autographs that way last year.

Kafumbly-
It isn't crazy to leave the tv/radio on for your pets. My parents had to do that for the first couple of weeks that we had our kitty. She turned out half-crazy anyway, but I still love the big fuzzball.

Hennepin Countyites, found out who your commissioner is, email them, and tell them we want a Stadium before Tuesday! Trust me, our Johan and Lew shirts won't be quite as much fun to wear when the Twins are contracted or in Vegas. Please, please help.

http://www.hennepin.us/vgn/portal/internet/hconlineservicemaster/0,2333,1273_1728_113117128,00.html

My two kitties are sadly unimpressed by the TV or by baseball. And they are significantly DISTURBED by me WATCHING baseball.

Of course, I am easily excitable.

Hooligan the Cat is a big LeRoy fan, I think because he can relate to being called "Husky" all the time(Hooligan weighs in at 23lbs).

Josie the Pussycat has gotten over her Albert Pujols crush and has settled on Sweetcheeks. She especially likes to watch him make swell catches off the wall and will swat at him in an attempt to help.

My littlest ones Gertie & Tess are rather fond of, well Little Nicky Punto.

Can I get a Michael Cuddyer shirt?

I really look up to him.

Sure you can, kid.

You're a 17-35/36, right?

This is friggin' hilarious. I did not take the time to read through all the comments, but I thought to myself, "What we REALLY need is some 'Free Terry Tiffee' shirts." Then I thought, "wait, maybe someone has already suggested that here." So I did a quick search for "Tiffee" in this thread.

11 hits. double-a started it off.

Man, I love you guys. Great minds think alike.

Oh, and this pretty much sums things up:

Fantasy Comparison:
Brandon Inge 227
Javy Lopez 201
Ivan Rodriguez 196
Jason Varitek 195
Corky Miller -12

(from Corky's player page on mlb.com)

And one last thing. On Corky's player page, it says his name is actually Abraham Phillip Miller. Then in the biography & career highlights, it starts off with, "Corky is his given name."

Maybe he was Corky at birth, then changed it legally to Abraham, but still goes by Corky.

I believe that Corky (Corky)'s given birth name is: Corky Abraham Phillip Miller. At least that is what someone posted a couple days back.

And HooliganKat makes a good point about hanging out after games. I haven't done it in years. But as I recall, if you wait about 45 minutes to maybe 90 minutes after a game ends, just about every player will filter out. They park in the surface lot that is attached to the "back" of the Dome. Have your own sharpie (or ball-point for balls). Also don't expect the Hunters and Mauers to always be willing to sign a ton of stuff. But the Bartletts and Crains likely will.

Any word on Lyle's MRI?

It's ironic for you to mention that, Scotty Dawg, because I was just on the Twins website and saw the heading about the MRI thing too. Having missed the game, my first reaction was:

"I knew there was something wrong with his head."

Turns out it was his arm. Oh well.

Anyway, like everyone else I question Gardy's brain as well when it comes to Corky Miller. See his comments on LNP starting at second instead of Rivas:

"If a guy plays the way Nick has the last couple of days, I think he deserves to be back out there," Gardenhire said. "He has dropped down bunts, run the bases ... he's into the game out there and that's what we are looking for. I've said all along that Luis Rivas is my second baseman. I like Luis a lot. But right now, this guy (Punto) is playing better."

Yet this is the man that has Corky Miller playing at the Major League Level, while Tiffee is down at AAA? Excuse me, but I saw Tiffee playing a heck of a lot better out there.

I hope that soon I'll get to say a not-so-fond farewell to Corky, and bring back Terry Spiffee.

(Shameless wording, I know, I am horribly unoriginal)

Batgirl,

Thank you for making my Morneau wish come true. I have now made my purchase, and look forward to seeing his man-crush power surge. And to think, I wept when Dougie left (I see him bat for the mets, and I feel nothing... breaking up is hard).

God bless you and the good Doctor.

Bestest regards,

BerserkerJosh

Does anyone else find it odd that Matthew Lecroy has sold two man crush t-shirts but no boyfriend shirts? He's a hot commodity with the guys!

Nah, he seems like a bit of a BEAR. :)

As for LeCroy...there should be a "pumpkinhead" t-shirt...I'd buy that one.

I LOVE the "Free Tiffee" shirts!!!! ok..so I'm a little biased being his wife and all! ;-) But a big THANK YOU to those of you in favor of "freeing Tiffee"!!!!! I would love to see those flying around at the game!!