This entry posted by Twayn, who has a hunch Baby Dash will enjoy Kevin Henkes.
"Hello. My name is Justin. I'm the American League MVP.
I like hockey and sandwiches and hitting home runs."
Justin had his own way of doing things. He always cut his Jimmy John's submarine sandwiches diagonally, for good luck. He always got out of bed on the same side, for good luck. And he never left the house without double-knotting his shoes, for good luck.
Justin always had the same thing for breakfast – toast with jam and peanut butter - for good luck. And he always carried a hockey puck in his back pocket. Just in case.
Justin’s best friend Joe was exactly the same way. That’s why they were best friends. Justin wouldn’t play baseball unless Joe played, and they never slid headfirst or swung at the first pitch, unless it was a hanging breaking ball. Joe wouldn’t call a pickoff play at first base unless Justin wanted to, and they always used hand signals in the infield. If Justin was hungry, Joe was too, but they rarely ate between meals. Justin and Joe, Joe and Justin. That’s the way it was.
They loved to play baseball. Once, when Joe accidentally swallowed a sunflower seed in the dugout and said he was afraid that a sunflower plant would grow inside him, Justin swallowed one, too.
“Don’t worry,” said Justin. “Now, if you grow a sunflower plant, I’ll grow one, too.”
For Halloween, Justin and Joe always dressed as things that went together – salt and pepper shakers, Canadian bacon and eggs, the Blues Brothers.
In spring, Justin and Joe shared the same locker room. In winter, they never threw snowballs at each other. In fall, they raked leaves and tried to get past the first round of the playoffs. And in summer, they reminded each other to wear sunscreen, so they wouldn’t burn. Justin and Joe, Joe and Justin. That’s the way it was.
And then Nicky moved into the neighborhood...
Nicky had his own way of doing things.
He wore band-aids all over his tiny body, to look brave. He talked backwards to himself in the infield, so base runners wouldn’t know what he was saying. And he never left the house without one of his nifty disguises, like a hungry piranha or a tiny superhero.
Nicky waved at all the fans that waved at him, even if he didn’t know who they were. And he always carried a loaded squirt gun in his back pocket. Just in case.
When Nicky asked Justin and Joe to play, they said they were busy. When he called them up on the phone, they disguised their voices and said they weren’t home. If Nicky was walking on one side of the street, Justin and Joe crossed to the other side and hid.
One day, while Justin and Joe were practicing baseball, some White Sox boys ran out onto the field. They ran in circles around Justin and Joe and yelled personal remarks at them. Justin and Joe didn’t know what to do. Just when they were about to give up hope, a cuddly looking bear wearing a Twins cap and jersey ran out of the dugout and frightened the White Sox boys away with a squirt gun.
“Are you who I think you are?” Justin asked the bear.
“Of course,” the bear replied.
“Thank you, Nicky,” said Justin.
“You’re welcome, Justin,” said Nicky.
“Thank you, Nicky,” said Joe.
“You’re welcome, Joe,” said Nicky.
“I’m glad you were wearing a disguise,” said Justin.
“And I’m glad you had your squirt gun,” said Joe.
“I always do,” said Nicky. “Just in case.”
Afterward, Justin invited Nicky over for lunch.
“You have a Muscle Mouse cup?” said Nicky.
“Of course,” said Justin.
“I do, too!” said Nicky.
“Same here,” said Joe.
That night, Nicky invited Justin and Joe to sleep over.
“You have a night light?” said Justin.
“Of course,” said Nicky.
“I do, too,” said Justin.
“Same here,” said Joe.
After that, when Nicky asked Justin and Joe to play they said yes. When he called them up on the phone, they had pleasant conversations. And if Nicky was walking on one side of the street, Justin and Joe waved and ran to catch up with him.
Justin and Joe wouldn’t play baseball unless Nicky played, and they never swung at the first pitch, unless it was a hanging breaking ball, of course. And they never slid headfirst, except for Nicky, who still had his own way of doing some things. Nicky taught Justin and Joe to talk backwards in the infield. And they taught him hand signals and how to double-knot his shoes. Justin and Joe and Nicky. That’s the way it was.
For Halloween, they dressed as the three blind umpires. For Christmas, Nicky gave Justin and Joe nifty disguises. And they gave him a box of multi-colored shoelaces – extra long for double knotting.
They loved to play baseball. When Justin and Joe told Nicky about how they had each swallowed a sunflower seed, Nicky swallowed three of them. “I’ll grow a sunflower plant for each of us,” he said.
In spring, Justin and Joe and Nicky shared a locker room together. In winter, they never threw snowballs at each other. In fall, they raked leaves and tried to get past the first round of the playoffs. And in summer, they reminded each other to wear sunscreen, so they wouldn’t burn. Justin and Joe and Nicky, Nicky and Joe and Justin. That’s the way it was.
And then Jason moved into the neighborhood...
Posted by twayn at March 27, 2007 10:07 PMSpec. Tac. U. Lar.
I'll look for this at Red Balloon for my 5-year old cousin. Hopefully her older brother can help her with "piranha."
Nice job, Twayn. What an excellent story for bedtime!
Posted by: Shelley at March 27, 2007 10:49 PMOoo,ooo! I want to hear more about Jason moving in. He looks like a pretty awesome guy judging from the pic ;-) Tomorrow night perhaps? Pleeeease?
fantastic stuff, Twayn.
Posted by: Newton at March 27, 2007 11:12 PMAnd then Carlos Silva and Sidney Ponson moved into the neighborhood and Justin and Joe and Nicky and Jason all said: "Speaking of hanging breaking balls...looks like we'll be able to spend more time raking leaves"
Posted by: Daniel Louden at March 27, 2007 11:49 PMgood stuf Twayn
Posted by: twin-X at March 27, 2007 11:50 PMI love it! Such a great story to fall to sleep by...I'm going to print it out so I can read it over and over!
Posted by: A-Bak at March 28, 2007 12:02 AMBut then, Johan and Joe N. move into the neighborhood, and the infield gang implores Chairman's grandfather for help. ;)
::Sadly, I think I know *which* team the puck is in Doc's pocket.::
Posted by: Piranhtachew at March 28, 2007 12:08 AMHey, did you see that yesterday's game was won (by the Twins) on a grounder by ... Toby Gardenhire??? Yes. (Booted by Yankee SS Chris Basak.)
So, I don't see why Dash couldn't get a few AB next spring.
Posted by: Slider Away at March 28, 2007 06:26 AM
What a heartwarming tale. It makes me feel all warm and fuzzy.
I'm waiting for Jason to teach the other three to wear tall socks. :hopes:
Excellent bedtime story, Twayn!
Posted by: JustBeth at March 28, 2007 08:25 AMSomeone really should tell Nicky that tall socks make you look taller! Because they do. And it's the right way to wear your socks anyhow.
Posted by: infield at March 28, 2007 08:40 AMI need a Spring Training report on Nutty.
Posted by: Fehler at March 28, 2007 08:59 AMThis story was faaaaantastic; one I could tell my children and my children's children if I wanted children.
Is there going to be more about Young Bart? I do love him. It could be a series like Dick and Jane or the Boxcar Children, er . . . Hobo Kids . . . or whatever those were.
Posted by: Bring Back Reboulet at March 28, 2007 09:58 AMThat story made my day. And I am definitely vote for Jason teaching them to wear their socks high!
Posted by: Elle at March 28, 2007 10:02 AMYes, tall socks are good. But proper stirrups, real, show-lots-of-white-sanitary-sock, Wayne Terwilliger stirrups, are even better. When we gaze out at the field and see nine proud, handsome young men with fire in their eyes and stirrups on their legs, then we'll know our time, Twins Time, has come. May that day arrive soon.
Posted by: adidasman at March 28, 2007 10:10 AMActually, adidasman, when that happens, we'll know we've been transported back in time to 1974... not that that would be so bad, of course.
Great stuff Twayn! Too funny!
Posted by: JimCrikket at March 28, 2007 10:28 AMWell done, twayn. A very enjoyable read. I look forward to more about Jason!
Posted by: Shane at March 28, 2007 10:56 AMDear Fehler,
Regarding your request for a cup check, Nutty and his friend Scotty Baker were reassigned to minor league camp last Friday. Their laconic response upon learning of the reassignment was a simple "Nuts."
Sincerely,
Twayn
Posted by: twayn at March 28, 2007 12:04 PMIt's a little off topic (nice story, Twayn), but I need to vent about the roster moves yesterday. I can't believe we sent Venafro, a lefty Neshek and our best performing reliever in spring training, to the minors (and therefore probably to another team) so we can stick with Silva and Durbin, two guys with ERAs over 9.00! Did we learn nothing from last year?! Ugh!!
Posted by: neckrolls at March 28, 2007 12:12 PMhahah! i love it!!
Posted by: Renae at March 28, 2007 12:15 PMI am going to print this and bind it.
Posted by: CarrieICL at March 28, 2007 12:42 PMIt's never that simple, Neckrolls. You know there's more to a decision like this than just stats.
Posted by: adidasman at March 28, 2007 01:15 PMPlease explain it to me - it would make me feel better.
Posted by: neckrolls at March 28, 2007 01:51 PMneckrolls, not that this will make you feel any better but...
While I don't agree with the decision it seems there are 3 reasons/scenarios that led to this decision.
1. They go with Gardy and carry 11 pitchers (leaving no room for mr. V)
2. Garza makes the rotation in witch case Gardy has said he would carry Silva in the bull pen. (don't ask me why!)
3. they go with TR and carry 12 pitchers the last being Durbin.
Good news,
Sounds like there IS SOME chance Venafro will stick around. I think if he does he will be up here by the end of April.
“I should be fine heading into the season,'’ Mauer said.
Good news!!!
http://www.startribune.com/blogs/neal/
Thank you, Twin-X!
2&3 make absolutely no sense to me. So I hope it's 1!
Posted by: neckrolls at March 28, 2007 02:28 PMIn the picture where the twins are celebrating, Cuddy's cameo at the far right is priceless!!!
Posted by: drscholl at March 28, 2007 02:49 PMTHIS MADE MY DAY! It's WAY too cute for words.
Posted by: TwinsPrincess at March 28, 2007 03:12 PMHey, Awesome story. Oh, and does anyone know who won that Opening Day Sweepstakes thing? :-( I wish I did!
Posted by: Bailey at March 28, 2007 03:22 PMThat was a masterpiece. It most definately made my day.
Posted by: carmen at March 28, 2007 06:28 PMso what happened when jason came along?
Posted by: Kelly at March 28, 2007 07:11 PMAbsolutely brilliant.
Posted by: Stacy at March 28, 2007 07:21 PMJackal is picked over Garza to start for the Twins.
In other news Mr. Ryan still loves the decision of starting last season with T-Phat and Castro in the infield.
Uh... Go Twins?
Posted by: cal at March 28, 2007 08:57 PMInfield and Addidasman, are you guys uniwatchers too?
Not many know the value of stirrups and high socks.
Posted by: TX Ken at March 28, 2007 09:06 PMAn interasting thing here,
http://sports.yahoo.com/mlb/news;_ylt=AhbOrNqsJKlsL7vDgR1n5Kcf0bYF?slug=ys-mlbpreview032807&prov=yhoo&type=lgns
And Luis "iceman" Castillo here,
http://www.startribune.com/150/story/1083732.html
Said Torii Hunter: "He's always flinching and talking to himself on the field. I think he's talking to himself. There's nobody else around."
NICE Torii,
twin-X
NOOOOOOOO! I usually try and stick with players as long as possible, but there have been a couple of guys this spring that has out-performed Silva. I like Silva but c'mon!!
Posted by: Bring Back Reboulet at March 28, 2007 09:58 PMDear Twins People
This Doug Meintkavich guy that we picked up this year. He can't hit worth a crap, can he ?
Would you like him back ?
p.e.m.
p.s.
Tall socks are overrated.
Great story Twayn. Muchos kudos to you!
I do have a question for Neckrolls, however. Where did you read/hear that Neshek was being sent to the minors? Say it isn't so!
Posted by: Mikey the Hoosier at March 29, 2007 09:14 AMDear p.e.m.,
We prefer the term "defensive savant" when describing the batting prowess of Doug Mientkiewicz. While we have fond memories of Dougie, our current first baseman seems to be adequate for the task. In fact, he's become most valuable of late. If you're proposing a trade, we are running a special this week on mediocre veteran starting pitchers. We have a wide selection available, and no reasonable offer will be refused.
Twayn
Posted by: twayn at March 29, 2007 10:22 AMDear Mikey the Hoosier,
I fear you misunderstood Neckrolls, who was describing Mike Venafro as a left-handed Pat Neshek. Venafro was reassigned to minor league camp Tuesday and has until tomorrow to decide whether to accept the assignment or become a free agent. Neshek will be starting the season in the Twins bullpen, proving there are at least some roster decisions the team doesn't completely botch, bungle or bollix.
Twayn
Posted by: twayn at March 29, 2007 10:39 AMHigh socks are overrated in the same way that Johan Santana and boobies are overrated.
Posted by: NIH at March 29, 2007 12:42 PMDear PEM:
I once harbored certion very passionate feelings for a defensively-gifted first baseman with tall socks by the name of Doug Mientkiewicz, but then he turned to the dark side and he is dead to me now.
Therefore, I have no idea who you are talking about.
Posted by: TwinsGoddess at March 29, 2007 01:55 PMActually, I've just noticed Chairman and Doc wear different shoe *brands*. :o
::Wonders if the Bitch Sox conducted a shoe scramble before Tiny Supes intervened.::
Posted by: Piranhtachew at March 29, 2007 02:52 PMDear TwinsGoddess
Yes playing for the 2004 Red Sox is as evil and souless as one could get. Lucky for you he now plays for the Yankees and you can resume your passionate love affair. Just get him to hit over .200 please
p.e.m.
Posted by: public enemy mike at March 29, 2007 10:53 PMAwww, what a beautiful tale of friendship and baseball. Makes you feel all warm and fuzzy inside.
Can't wait for opening day!
P.S. Tall socks. . . so NOT overrated!
I have this theory about tall socks: Women like them so much because they remind us of the days when men wore waistcoats and cravats and knee breeches and generally cared about what they wore everyday. When Bart and Sideshow walk out in their tall socks, they're saying to us, "Not only are we going to kick ass, we're going to look good doing it."
Posted by: Spacey Stacey at March 30, 2007 06:47 AMTwayn, that was great. Lovely photos, too. I'm so glad that Nicky has been brought into the Cool Kids fold. ;)
Posted by: FH at March 30, 2007 03:37 PM