Nay, but I have an answer for poor lovelorn Eric: DON'T BUY HER A PINK BASEBALL CAP! :)

Oh man, I wish I had a girlfriend who bought me Tecmo Super Bowl. :(

Dear BatGirl,

We know the answer -- it is 42.

But what is the question?

Ponderingly,
CarrieICL

PS. Could it be the number of a DH?

Dear PEM I know it just bring back bad memories for me. Also That is the monment i most remember him for also for a differnent reasons of course.

Could it be the number of a DH?

Not unless you can lure Jackie Robinson out of retirement. Mariano Rivera wouldn't be much of a DH, and I think he's the only one still allowed to wear it.

Super Tecmo Bowl = all-nighters trying to finish a 16 game season in one sitting.

Just thinking about it makes my eye sockets burn...

Candlesticks always make a nice gift...

Dear Batgirl,

I am concerned. Ump47 seems to be stuck in 1991. This is not surprising considering it was the last time the Twins won the World Series, but I am concerned with ump's inevitable humiliation when he makes reference to the wrong President Bush.

I am also extremely impressed with your insightful and empathetic response to Eric's quandry. You are clearly even wiser than I had imagined (and believe me, I imagined you extremely wise). Thus, I will ask you and your readers for suggestions for my baby's name. He or she (we haven't found out the sex yet) is excpected to arrive in about 3 weeks (when position players report) and Mrs. YankeeFan and I have not yet decided on potential names.

I look forward to your suggestions.

Thank you in advance,
YankeeFan

Baby name suggestions:
Boy: Torii, Koskos, Carlos, Johan, Joe, Joe, Luis, Lewwwwww, Juan.

Girl: See Twins Next Top Model.

Glad to be of service.

Wow, thanks so much BG for the sage advice. You really do have all the answers. One conundrum I find myself in is whether or not to even introduce her to the Twins, as I am sure something tragic might happen like her finding The Chairman more engaging and attractive than myself (I wouldn't blame her).

Well, at least I have sideburns...

Oh, Eric, fear not - if you have sideburns, that's all that really matters. That's what drew my wife to me...my dazzlingly bold lamb chops. (She says she fell for me in spite of them, but I know better.) She will love you more for leading her to baseball than she could ever love The Chairman, for she would never have found him were it not for you.

As for YankeeFan, it's hard to offer actual suggestions without knowing your surname, but here are a few to avoid: Madison, Tyler, Dylan, Harrison, Dakota, Montana, Zachary, Dweezil. Good luck, God bless, and may your child grow up to be a Twins fan. It's for his/her own good.

Craig in MN: Marry me.

YankeeFan: "Seven" ;)

Eric: she must be assimilated.

BAT bandwagoner:

"Seven" has been eternally tarnished as a name for me...as I am sure you all have seen this:

http://www.post-gazette.com/pg/06027/645226.stm

My wife doesn't think Paulie O. works for a little jewish child.

I am crossing Madison (great nickname and we're all about the nicknames), Dylan, and Zachary off the list at addidasman's bequest. Harrison just got cut by the Missus last night. Hadn't thought of Koskos, but I assume it will suffer the same fate as Cronos :)

Hopelessly lost in the etymology of nomenclature,
YankeeFan

P.S. addidasman, my child will hopefully grow up to be a baseball fan, loving the Yankees, hating the Red Sox, and appreciating quality baseball from anyone else. With the way the Twins represent, no doubt s/he will be like her daddy, and be appreciative of the Twins (and this blog).

Cronus, that is.

Eric,

You must show her the Twins, for if you do not, you do not show her yourself.

Besides, if she sees the Chairman and still comes to you, she has passed the true test. I worried about the same thing when I exposed my now-wife to my Twins obsession. Though she showed an unusual interest in Jacque Jones, she still came to me at the end of the day.

Dear Batgirl:

Why can't more Yankee fans be like YankeeFan?

In respect,

Neil

If it's any consolation, BG, I'm sure your ex thinks of you whenever he blows into Tecmo Super Bowl to get it to work. Just like I think of my fiancee every time I transform Optimus Prime (my birthday present from her last year) from semi to robot form.

YankeeFan: Go with something elaborate, like "Gunnery Sergeant Marguerite 'Boom Boom' Bordeaux, USMC Retired" or something. I think you'll find giving your child an honorific from birth will really gain them a lot of respect.

Actually, the name "Seven" was ruined for me when they used it on "Married... With Children". Prior to that I always thought it would be a great name for a burro...

And how could any self-respecting YankeeFan not have "Mickey" high on the list?

Addendum:

Or "Yogi"

The first valentine's day gift I got from my (now) husband was a wireless router (in part so I could do nifty stuff with my Tivo). Ah, geek love.

For Christmas this year, I got him a Twins cap (where the logo lights up) and one of those sweet Reyn Spooner Twins Hawaiian shirts, among other things. My parents gave him a really nice Joe Mauer shirt. I used Twins wrapping paper (available at the pro shop) on some gifts.

Wow opening the door to any question, sartorial or metaphysical is a dangerous thing to do, but I will resist the temptation to ask anything too far out there. But here are a few.

Firstly, is Batgirl and team going to watch the Winter Olympics? Do team members have favorite events?

What does Batgirl think about the World Baseball championships? (I think it is a suckup to the soccer crowd.)

Thirdly, we all have heard about Oprah's rant and that one book, I want to give you a chance to come clean. Has anything you have written on the blog ever been not entirely true?

I just have to say that if someone bought me a Twins jersey for Valentine's Day, I would be his forever.

Roscoe,

You have a great point. Perhaps YourEminence would be a good first name. I can see the exchange in first grade:

Teacher: Would you like some milk YourEminence?
My child: Yes, set it down at once and be gone with you.

On second thought, perhaps not. I foresee too many parent-teacher conferences (which if my child is anything like me, there will be enough of them as it is).

Mickey and Yogi and Paulie and Donny and Bernie and Willie (yes, still) and Knobby and Steve and Reggie and Guidry and Catfish (and even Jesse, after Barfield) are all possible names for me, but have been ruled out by Mrs. YF. And she uses her veto liberally. But then again, so do I.

YF

Soccer fan:

This batling thinks that the World Baseball Classic is a good idea but should happen in July when players are in midseason form. Of course, that means that owners would lose games (translate money) so will never happen.

Kind of like the World Cup in June at end of season--should be played like now--when players are in midseason form--not in June when worn out from playing in league (say Premiership in England) UEFA Champions League, and two or three other tourneys like FA Cup. Of course that means owners must give up games to play world cup--never happen.

Liverpool, Chelsea and ManU guys will play like 65 or 70 games starting in August and then go to World Cup fresh--yeah right....

DAM

Fortunately for my wife, we had a daughter and I wasn't able to use Harmon. I did try her with Kirby which is a unisex name and she nixed that as well (maybe having the wisdom to realize that many heroes fall).

We ended up choosing the name Carmen which is close enough to Harmon to keep me happy.

My advice on names is: don't choose something that requires the bearer to spell it when introducing herself/himself.

Also, Freaknomics has an interesting chapter on names.

In keeping with apparant family tradition, I think the best name for YankeeFan and Mrs. YF's little one would be TwinsFan.

Dino -- too funny.

Once the child is born, I may refer to him/her as YankeeFan Jr. (following the Pac Man, Ms. Pac man and Pac Man Jr. tradition).

Another question for the all-knowing BatGirl:

Who is making the playoffs this year and who will win the World Series? Here's hoping it's some 300:1 team I can wager my meager life savings on...

YF

Whatever you do MR. and MRS. Yankee Fan don't name it Apple I'm still wondering if Celebrities should be allowed to have kids. On a related note Baseball America has the Twins top ten prospects up no surprise on who's on top.

YF,

May I suggest a dual Twins/Yanquis name for your offspring that works with either gender...

Torre/Torii/Tori/Tory

So are you trying to determine the proper Tori Spelling?

Sorry.

Yankee Fan Has Roger been ruled out?

hearaldguy: "Number Seven" shoutout!

Awesome.

Dino - ugh.
Roger is *not* an option.
Torre/Torii is a nice option.

Screw it, we're just going to go with Jeb for a boy and Sooz for a girl.

YF

Eric--

I was once in your shoes. Eighteen and a half years ago I met the woman who is now my wife. I am a lifelong Twins fan; she had never watched a sports event on television in her life. Some free advice, which is meant seriously:

Do not try to force her to become a fan. Give her some gradual exposure to the game, but do not put any pressure on her. She either will become a fan, or she won't, but it must be her choice. In my case, my wife has never become a Twins fan, a baseball fan, or any kind of a sports fan at all.

Make sure, however, that she understands how important sports are to you. In my case, while my wife could not care less about sports, she has never once, in over sixteen years of marriage, given any indication that she thinks I spend to much time on sports or complained about my fandom in any way. This includes watching the last game of the 1989 World Series on our wedding night and watching the Vikings on Monday Night Football on our honeymoon.

The point is that she does not have to enjoy everything you do, and you do not have to enjoy everything she does. You must, however, respect each other as you are, and accept each other as you are.

Best of luck to you.

I am impressed by your wisdom JeffA.

I am married to a man who accepts my devotion to the Twins but admittedly doesn't understand it. Although he has agreed to spend our wedding anniversary in April at a Twins/Angels game.

Eric - My ex-husband (strong emphasis on the EX) gave me a ladder for Valentine's Day one year. Not one of his stellar moments.
I recommend a visit to the Bat Store. You can't go wrong and you can ease your way into the jersey market.

YF

Donny, Reggie, Whitey, Micky, Scooter, Paulie, Hideki, and Derek are all great boys names

Straw, Doc, Jeter, Sojo, Goose and Leyritz make excellent middle names

There is only one name for a girl.....
Ruth

I have to add to voices on not forcing your love of the Twins on your special someone. My wife was never a baseball fan until we met. I didn't force and she isn't the biggest fan in the world but through me she has gotten to appreciate the game and the Twins.

I hope you get to have a similar expericence.

YF, might I suggest looking through history (not just US history) books for a name. It's what my wife and I did. And I was able to tie it into my love of the Twins (his nickname is AJ) Best of luck.

Here's another angle on the issue..

Is there anyone here in BatLand named after a sports figure by their parents? Did it affect your esteem, ie, did you feel pressure to be as spectacular as your namesake? How did it affect your upbringing? Were you constantly worried about being traded, or did you long for free-agency?

I think it would be a good idea to get the opinion of the full-grown babies, once named for sports heroes.

YankeeFan,

Ever considered Sparticus? Or maybe Theo?:)

Sincerely,
Twinsboy

I wasn't named after a Sports play but rather A paul with certian Musical talents and was in a group that has strong insect relations. I don't know if Yankee Fan will consider Theo for any longer than i would consider Derek. For a great baseball name i would suggest Boof just a personal favorite.

Dear Batgirl,

Since my customary seat is actually visible from the field, and therefore my actions could easily be witnessed by players, which reaction to the wearing of pixie vests will be least damaging to our boys' delicate psyches?

1. Uncontrollable sobbing
2. Uncontrollable giggling, with occasional pointing
3. Curling up in a ball underneath my seat and refusing to look

Keep in mind that the player closest to me will be the good Doctor.

Please reply before the home opener, so I can be prepared.

Sincerely,
infield

Jeff A, very sound advice. I apologize for not further explaining- didn't know it would generate interest- but she is already very much a sports enthusiast, just not a fan of any particular team. So this would involve less encouraging than a previously uninterested party, simply a channeling of sports interest towards one team.

(and she has already said that she is not a fan of any team, but that "being around someone who is a fan of a team" would possibly influence her)

Channeling interest is a beautiful thing. RD's heartthrob, the incredible Sweet-n-Sassy, not only gave me a Chicago Bears hoodie for Christmas, but asked if she could wear my Urlacher jersey for the Bears-Carolina playoff game. That reinforced her standing as a true Goddess of the universe and made the unfortunate loss (just a little bit) easier to take.

Eric, if she's already predisposed to fandom but, as of yet, unattached, then your job is easier.
Simply immerse her in the culture of the Twins.

I have always been a baseball fan, but became a Mets' fan when that's the team I got to see every day on cable. I may have my own "home" team after years of longing and I love them, but I will always be a Mets' fan.

Team loyalty is learned behavior reinforced by repeated exposure. By the time X-mas rolls around, you'll not only have a Twins' fan, but you'll know just which "boyfriend" name to stitch on her jersey gift.

Batgirl,

One of Jupiter's moons, Europa, has a interior mantle of liquid salt water beneath its icy crust. As life on earth first evolved in the depths of the oceans, scientists believe it is quite possible that aquatic carbon-based life has evolved there and are hoping to discover a way to determine for sure.

My question: which do you believe will happen first? That life will evolve on Europa with an IQ greater than the average Bitch Sox fan (defined as sea anemones and up), or that we will begin to use such desolate wastelands as the British once used Australia, a place to banish our convicts and manipulative owners?

I await your answer.

--ndthsmdy

Eric - The advice of Jeff A is sound, indeed. My wife never followed baseball in any form, nor had she any interest in professional sports. All I did was buy her a Twins cap (a small beginning) and then take her to a Twins game in Baltimore (we live in DC). A year later, we were in Minnesota, we went to two games at the Dome, and she left town with a Koskie t-shirt and the fickering embers of some real enthusiasm. Now she stays up and watches the games with me on the dish, she catches the scores on the radio and knows who most of the players are, and she loved it when our baby son and I posed for pictures with our matching Twins caps and jerseys on. So be patient...you may end up being pleasantly surprised.

Eric: Even though she's a fan of sports in general, I would recommend giving her something you know she will like for Valentine's Day.

However, a Twins jersey might be a great idea for a non-holiday-related gift. Something out of the blue. An example: I love comic books and want to share that with my fiancee, because there's a comic for everybody, you know? But since she isn't interested in them already, I make sure to only give them to her at times when gifts are not expected (i.e. not Christmas, her birthday, or V-Day). That way, it's a surprise present that shows how much I love her, instead of me "wasting" a Christmas or birthday gift on something I want her to have.

I know there's a big price difference between a jersey and a comic, but... I just figured you'd love some more unsolicited advice thrown your way!

YF: Goose?

Kinda off topic, but the Twins website now has a spring training countdown.

Let me just say, if you bought me Tecmo Super Bowl, even today, I would propose on the spot.

My name suggestions:

Boy: Ozzie, Paul, Jon, Mark, Jose, A.J., Joe, Scott. I would have said Aaron or Frank, but they're out of style now!

Girl: Minnie. What else?

Eric Just Buy Poster of mauer and Tori and post them around the Apartment/House/Condo/van down by the river/Whatever. I think the constant exposer would swing her your way.

I feel like I'm drawing too much attention to myself here (we should be talking Twins, right?), so I'll chime in with name suggestions...

Some of my favorites-
Boy: Victor, Andre, Lars (I like any nordic names, honestly)
Girls: Hannah, Sophia, Amber

Eric, Nice choice on a girl's name. Hmm, I think maybe you should buy your girlfriend a gift AND something Twins related.

~Hannah~

It just struck me what the off-season really does to us hard core fans. :)

YF: my only suggestion on naming your child is, if you choose a name that's fairly common, don't spell it weird. You're only setting yourself and your child up for a lifetime of annoyance.

Sincerely,
Jennefer

Jennefer's post made me laugh loudly.

Quality stuff.

I was called out by YF. I have arrived!

P.S. Read my lips: no new taxes.

I must admit, you guys are certainly a creative bunch.

So to recap, y'all have suggested Mickey for a boy and Minnie for a girl.

Jennefer -- that's great advice from someone who obviously knows what she's talking about (assuming you are female -- with your parents' naming convention, who knows :))

ump47 - I wouldn't call anyone out on here -- the only people I call out are left fielders who play at Yankee Stadium (against the Yanks) and sometimes umpires...hey, wait a sec....do I know you? You're Mark Wegner aren't you?

http://mlb.mlb.com/NASApp/mlb/mlb/official_info/umpires/bio.jsp?id=2966

Anyway, thanks for all the name suggestions, we will continue to take them until BG posts a new topic :)

Thanks for the overwhelming support and outpouring of good wishes.

Truly,
YankeeFan

Speaking of gender assumptions... well, they're not annoying enough for me to want to give up my super-awesome name. Besides, I had it before all those whiny 5 year old boys and that British swinger guy, anyway.

Austin.
*is a chick*

If someone else has learned from my parents' mistake, then at least some good came of it. My work here is done.

:-)

(yes, I am female. they're not THAT crazed!)