Carrots are good for the eyes....maybe our batters should eat more of them.

kw... I just have no words.

that has to be the silliest thing I've seen in a very long time. um... thank you?

hee hee. I enjoyed it very much!

kw that's great. Except now I'm hungry.

100% of the USDA recommended daily allowance of sass.

Hehehe,
KW-you rock!
Damn the first inning anyway! DicknBert made the comment that I think we have mentioned here a few times...let Crain start the game so we can get through the first inning scoreless.
Man, the pace we are on this year...I say NOT A BAD IDEA!

Oh, and I thought it was funny when good ol Joe fell rounding first. Well, not quite so funny, until he laughed, then funny!

The only thing I found impressive about last night's game was that when I turned off the radio to go to church, the score was 4-0 (the top of the first just ended). When I made it out to the car, Kyle had only given up one more run, while the Twins had scored four.

But this giving the opponents a lead in the first strategy really should be reconsidered.

(And, kw, it goes without saying that this entry was absolutely awesome!)

As a vegetarian, I thank you.

Legumevision? Ha! Love it.

LegoVision has spawned parodies.

kw, you are the Brent Abernathy of sass. Called up to fill in at midseason, you have proven yourself most worthy.

Don't run into any walls.

HooliganKat!... I missed you last night. I didn't catch your last post so I didn't know to look for you. I had a black shirt, yellow Gophers hat... maybe row 10-ish. Perhaps you saw me?

NY Times on Dougie Baseball (reg req)...

http://www.nytimes.com/2005/06/16/sports/baseball/16doug.html?

Kw-- truly great.
Yeah Kyle was channeling Bradke in the first apparently, but what I'm trying to figure out is, who let JC channel Lyle?! Fortunately or no, the upper deck is too great a distance from which to leap onto the field with a vial of holy water and a bell....

Dear KW,
Excellent coverage. You addressed some crucial angles that most of the sports writers neglected and dramatized the ups and downs of the Twins pitching so effectively that I feel like I was at the game.

[edited]

Go Twins!

Legumevision! Inspired work, KW!

kw,

Much applause! Bravo!

k-bro

Why was Sox Fan's comment edited? It was a light comment meant to be slightly amusing to the author and yet it was edited? That's something a BSox site would do. I welcome comments like that as it makes it all the better when the Sox inevitably collapse under the weight of their own egos.

A troll is a troll is a troll is a troll....

I congratulate the editor for de-trolling the site.

I think the whole post is inflammatory and sarcastic to be honest.

Down with Sox Fan.

Thanks "Not a Sox Fan," for everything except that inaccurate prediction. I'm sorry that the blog is only interested in publishing one viewpoint.

Go Sox!

well, don't blame Batgirl. blame me. if you have an issue, send me an email and we'll discuss it. my email address is linked in my name.

I agree with NASF. "Sox Fan" has a long history on this site as being a goofy and charming, if not totally misguided, antagonist. The bazooka should be saved for the true majority of Bitch Sox fans, the ones with hearts of pure carbon-14 and remedial English skills. Just my $.02.

Mr. Lecroy, I did not remember seeing you, however I probably did, I was up about 4 rows.

Perhaps another time. . .

Couple of notes from Camp HK:

I'm really starting to not like Wednesday night games. I think the level of drunken obnoxiousness is increasing. Don't get me wrong, I'm all for enjoying the game with some adult beverages, but there is absolutely no need to act like a raving mad lunatic while at the game. I have a possible solution to this problem. If there is enough Upper GA season ticket holders we should be allowed one season ticket holder only section. I mean come on the silly family section has 2 sections, neither of which EVER get filled (even during the Yankee games). So I think they can cough up one of those.

Anywho, seems Lyle showed up to pitch, which really disappointed me. I really was starting to get on the Lohsey bandwagon and wham, bam, thank you ma'am, he pitches himself into a disaster in the first inning. J.Ro was no better. Why don't we leave Jesse Crain in longer? Why? I want answers, the kid is doing so well, and whenever he comes in I breathe a sigh of relief because I know the side is going to be sat down like the bitches they are. I really don't have anything else to say about this game, I was very underwhelmed by the game last night.

I will be in attendance again tonight, although I have a "work outing" today beginning at noon. Advertising people + Alcohol, well you do the math, I should be lit up like a Christmas tree by game time.

okay, well... it seems I have abused my power, then. I relinquish my troll-snuffing power to heraldguy until the Batfamily returns.

I guess I just have a lower tolerance for taunting.

please, let's get back to Twins love. it was not my intention to take the focus away from the Twins. if you want to discuss this further, seriously, send me an email.

so how 'bout that Jesse Crain, eh?

guys, before you get all truly het up ... keep in mind this is still a moderated site and whoever is given charge of the button is the one in charge.

There is no such thing as "free speech" on a moderated site. Anything that could be deemed to be deliberately insulting or offensive is always a lightening rod for editing. All us posters should do our best to keep that in mind. Our motives are always scrutinized and occasionally even misinterpreted so some care should be taken by us when we put something up.

just MY $.02 worth..

Kat, I'm surprised to hear that the Dome is starting to resemble Shea Stadium in terms of drunken, obnoxious fans. I even heard booing last night.

We have a similar problem, but a little worse in that we have ONE family section, in the upper deck. One section in the entire stadium that is alcohol-free, and it's in the nosebleeds.

Britain had the right idea in banning alcohol altogether at soccer games. They realized that the fighting and other obnoxious behavior (taunting, player abuse, vicious chanting) was fueled by alcohol, and just like kindergarten, the morons who couldn't behave like human beings got everyone punished.

They also instituted ID cards. If you acted like a moron, you were escorted out, your ID card was confiscated, and you were no longer welcome at the games (you couldn't get in without an ID card).

I won't even go to Met games anymore. I have an awful time due to the obnoxious behavior of the "fans" so I've decided to stay away. It's sad, as I love baseball (and the Mets) more than life itself. But it's no longer a fun day/night out. It's more like being the only girl at a frat-house bachelor party, with the added bonus of the team being mercilessly and cruelly abused by their own so-called fans.

Why must people do this to baseball, WHY???

Yes. Bat-girl.com is not a democracy. Freedom of speech does not apply. It's OK to like another team and talk about them here, but not at the expense of the Twins and their fans. Taunting of the Twins and their fans should never be welcome here... by fans of ANY team, not just the B-Sox.

Kafumbly did not ban SoxFan. Simply edited a comment.

*sniff* Laurie.. did you read the article about Dougie?!?! my heart just bleeds for him..

Why would the blog be interested in more than one viewpoint? Surely this is a TWINS blog....

Yeah, Babs. I've been watching it all unfold right before my very eyes. It's been really, really painful. This is the wrong place to be in a slump. What they're doing to poor Kaz Matsui is inhuman. He gets booed every time he shows his face. And they all think it's OK to treat a fellow human being like this. They enjoy making him feel like crap. I guess it makes them feel better about their own unhappy lives to be able to make a millionaire so miserable he can't function.

I look forward to road trips. The away fans are far nicer to the Mets than the home fans.

I think people are of the opinion that if they chose to be professional athletes, then they should be able to take it. I've often said the same thing, but never with the thought in mind that people would be so cruel and evil.

tough love, sure... but you never boo your own team.

"tough love, sure... but you never boo your own team."

Amen, Kafumbly, amen.

anyone who would boo their own team does not deserve the title of "fan". You have to earn that one too... *snort*

Being an athlete is a profession. It's a job, but people never see it that way because they see it as just glamour and money. They forget that athletes are people too, and they're out there doing their jobs in front of tens of thousands of people. People sometimes fail at their jobs, no matter what the job and how much they're paid. No person, no matter WHAT they do, should ever have to "take" being abused and ridiculed publicly for not being perfect.

I happen to think the people at Verizon are incompetent at their jobs. Their incompetence annoys, inconveniences and often costs me. But what do you think would happen if I showed up at their place of business, stood there and watched as they did their jobs, and shouted abuse and obscenties at them when they made a mistake?

I'd be arrested. And rightly so.

Babs... I happen to think that anyone who boos their own team (especially for every single infraction, no matter how small--like at Shea Stadium) is guilty of deliberately sabotaging their team. And I don't particularly enjoy being surrounded by people who sabotage my team, nor do I consider them fans. So now I elect to stay home.

Laurie-
It's really sad that non-fans have to go and ruin games for you and other real fans. No one should ever boo their team. Athletes are human. They make mistakes. People should remember that.

Reminds me of a wonderful Simpsons moment -

It was the episode where Mr Burns stocked the company softball team with ringers from MLB.

Darryl Strawberry is in the outfield, and Bart and Lisa start up with the "Darryl... Darryl..." chant. Marge says, "Kids, that's not nice" to which Bart replies, "Mom, he's a professional athlete. He's used to it."

Cut to Darryl with a single tear running down his cheek.

that's absolutely true, Laurie. a guy who feels his own fans hate him is going to get hesitant at the plate because he'll eventually be more worried about not hitting than hitting, and it's going to affect his stance at the plate and his swing, and he's not going to produce. it's a vicious cycle. and when it's a pitcher... well... hi, Lyle.

although KYLE LOHSE was marvelous striking out the side. man, that was just hot. he seems to be able to bounce back most times, which I think means he's going to be okay eventually.

I agree Laurie. I also have no problem with removing individuals who violate the rules of decent decorum (even to opposing players) in the name of "fandom".

If any individual determines to be abusive and disruptive regardless of the reason, it should be dealt with accordingly. I don't think buying a ticket is a license for behavior that would get you arrested if you tried it on the street corner.

Kafumbly-- Yeah, Kyle was actually good last night, from the second inning on. Very, very good. I have _no_ idea what that first inning was about, but I _do_ know that I left the game far more annoyed about JC's meltdown than Lyle "Bradke" Khose's first inning.

Could be worse -

Could be Italy, where soccer fans throw lit flares at opposing players...

The way fans are treating Matsui is awful. Maybe his teammates should show some solidarity. It was an awfully different situation, but back when the fans kept booing Jackie Robinson, the extremely popular Pee Wee Reese walked over to Robinson, put his arm around him, and stood there with him. Some people continued to booh Robinson of course, but the gesture was important to him and a lot of other people as well.

Go Sox!

LOL, HG. You know, it is a common misperception that athletes don't care about being abused, that it doesn't bother them because their paychecks are so big. That is so far off the mark, it's sad. They hear it, they care and it hurts them. Sometimes you fail even when you do your best, and being abused only makes matters worse.

I'm hoping both Dougie and Kaz are able to calm down on this long road trip and find their mojo again. But of course here, you're only as good as your last at-bat once they've decided you're their chosen scapegoat (we have one every year). You can get 3 hits and be responsible for the only runs of the game, but if you strike out in your last at-bat, you'll be booed and shouted at until your next hit.

Met fans have taken the sass out of Dougie, something those of us who "know" him thought was an impossible task. And he's not even their chosen "blame everything on him" whipping-boy!

Another thing people don't seem to get is that athletes also have personal problems. I've seen guys get mercilessly booed by the fans every night, meanwhile these people have no idea that this guy's wife just had a miscarriage, or left him and took their kids and he has no idea where they are. They're trying to perform anyway but the combination of their personal lives AND the fan abuse makes it impossible. We all have personal problems and still have to do our jobs, but we usually don't have 40,000 mean, vindictive, cruel, bitter people abusing and ridiculing us on top of it.

I think we should put together a "we love you Dougie" card to send him... not to let his bat off the hook because he has really been struggling with that and he does kind of need to be able to hit, not just do the splits for phenomenal catches at 1st base... But just to say, we know you are trying - we still love you no matter who you play for!!

Just taking care of all my random thoughts in one post:

1. I hate fans booing their own team members. That's what I like about the Dome--we usually groan when our guys make a mistake, recognizing that they know it was a mistake and that we know mistakes do happen. I'm not in favor of booing other teams' players, except when the pitcher throws to first six times in a row and it's Matthew LeCroy on first. C'mon, man, he's *not* going to steal second! You're just delaying the game! Torii Hunter gets two throws before the annoyance starts--it's a sign of respect to get a couple of throws over there. (Personally, I was never more embarassed to be a Twins fan than the Yankees' series, when the Dome roared with "Yankees Suck!" chants, but that's just me, wanting a friendly atomosphere.)

2. It's in Kyle's contract that Lyle gets to pitch to a certain number of players each games. Some games, Lyle's performances are spread out between Kyle's, so they don't matter (a couple singles one innings, a double another inning, a solo homer in another doesn't hurt as much). Last night Lyle took over the first inning.

3. Bat-Girl herself will delete any comments that she feels are not in proper support of the meaning of this site--the Twins. If I understand, the original intent of this site was a Twins' fan site of sass, not a place for all fans to discuss their favorite teams.

Good idea Babs. Maybe we should throw a pack of bubble gum in there too.

ooooooo @ ndtf

GOOD IDEA!!

Laurie? as a Met fan, is there something you think we should do or know?

Um, so do the fastballs still have some "cheese" on them?

Do the pitchers throw gas?

Last week I had mentioned that the Whi..Ummm.. Bitch Sox had been getting breaks throughout the season because teams they were about to play, had key injuries during the series with them. Well, just before the Sox play the Dodgers, we find out that lights out closer Eric Gagne has a sprained ligament in his elbow and may be gone for the season. He was definitely a difference maker in the series against the Twins.

Enjoy bitch sox, your time will come.

Right now Dougie is beating himself up. He's being even harder on himself than the fans are, and that's saying a lot. He should be grateful for the existence of Kaz Matsui, or he'd really be hearing it.

He's in a slump, just like Torii was. Like Torii, he's a good hitter and good hitters rarely forget how to hit overnight. But unlike Torii, it appears that Dougie's problem is more mental than physical right now.

My fantasy fix? A bunch of Twins fans move to New York and sit behind first base every day in Mientkiewicz 16 shirts cheering him on. But I don't think that will happen.

Cauliflower Lohse, huh. I thought that was a boxing term.

Very funny and bizarre.

El Diablo, cheese is vegetarian. Not vegan, but vegetarian. Gas is universal. LOL

Great recap, and good message. It's always nice when a recap comes with a moral.

I'm set for two games in a row now, going to tonight's and tomorrows.

Hopefully I'm going to see at least ONE victory. And I'm sitting in some pretty sweet seats tonight (Sec 101 row 9).

When Stewart hits his 100th homerun, I'll be there to catch it. :)

awesome, Torhu!

I'll be there tonight, sec 221 row 1!!! yahoo! so when Stewie hits his 1,000,000,000th foul ball, I'll be there to catch it!

Aw, you guys are making me cry. You all are so sweet and caring about all the baseball players. You totally know what i'm feeling right now.

*sniff*

Thanks.

I'm jealous of both of you.

the recap was hilarious, kw. i'm very impressed.

Don't worry about a thing, Dougie. I got your back. Thanks for writing.

Oh, and Just Beth... A Yankees Suck chant is always appropriate, no matter what. There's never a wrong time or place for a Yankees Suck chant. I think that's in the Constitution, actually.

except maybe when you're squished into a room with several hundred yankees fans and you're the only one who's not, but that probably won't happen, so i wouldn't worry about it.

I'm coming into the conversation late, so I'll try to keep it short since the discussion seems to be past.

Sox Fan (or at least the one that posts with this e-mail address, I've banned others taking that name but with different IPs/addresses for trolling) is a decent chap despite his Southside loyalty. As far as whether Batgirl would have let it go or not, I'll just point to his post on 5/18 in the "Lost and Found" thread. He made a similar post that Batgirl let go.

Most of us who were around last season remember Sox Fan as being a good guy to have around, and the teasing was good-natured in both directions. Sox Fan has had a low profile around here this season, but I can assure all that despite the teasing nature of what he said, it wasn't for the purpose of inciting a flame war which is what a lot of trolls get a kick out of.

Ok, not so short I guess. I just wanted to stand up in defense of Sox Fan, as kw and Not A Sox Fan have done before me.

Oh, and kw, great job on the recaps these past couple days.

I'm all for the positive representation of tofu, vegetables and soymilk in the context of baseball. Tofuu Hunter is my new hero. Finally, a ballplayer all of us vegetarians can call our very own.

Tofuu is the man. Err... the soy!

soy does bad things to my digestive system. I'm afraid I can't join in the Tofuu love... I'll have to stick with giving my love to Torii.

and Jesse Crain. and Joe Nathan. and Lew Ford. and...

>My fantasy fix? A bunch of Twins fans move to >New York and sit behind first base every day in >Mientkiewicz 16 shirts cheering him on. But I >don't think that will happen.

Lets go, Laurie. I already got my shirt!

Dearest Free Speech Hater,

So, have I been right in asking Lohse to go soak his head? I didn't necessarily mean it in the cauliflower sense, but I guess that will do.

I always knew that Romero is a has bean.

Looks like the Giants are improving. I hear they have their goal to be in first place by the All Star Break, or at worst, Julienne.

- Meatless Joe

I think calling someone a free speech hater may be a little strong.

and let's also keep in mind that I, and NOT Batgirl, deleted the comment that I perceived to be taunting.

please, let's not argue about it here. as I have said twice already, if you have an issue with my deletion of the comment, send me a damn email.

Anyone know why Cuddy was playing 2B instead of his customary 3-Bag? Did he get demoted to 2B because he missed an easy-candy-hop-with-whipped-cream on Tuesday night? Or was this something less sinister? Personally, I think Cuddy's a better two-bagger than a trey-bagger.

Cuddy was playing second because I guess Gardy didn't want to put Li'l Luis in there, and we have no other 2B. so Cuddy to 2B and Oz to 3B.

Cuddy used to play 2B for the Twins. Actually it seemed like he used to play every position. Last night it just was kind of puzzling because he is the starting 3rd baseman on this team and you'd think others without his seniority should have been moved out of position before him. I still have to wonder what Gardy is really thinking here.

HAHAHA

I loved the recap kw

I thought it was a testament to his versatility to move him for one game.

of course, seeing as how 2B is cursed right now, I'd prefer to see Cuddy at 3B.

Kafumbly, I like your version better. :-)

Here's a link to a STrib article about Cuddy.
http://www.startribune.com/stories/509/5459730.html

Back to work for me... My computer's running slower than Matty LeCroy right now.

That is, the article is about Cuddy playing at second last night.

Things have gotten worse in Dougie World. The Mets are indeed starting Brian Daubach at 1B today. This does not bode well. It may be tough love, but it may also be they're auditioning people for his job. I've been getting the feeling all season that Dougie rubs Willie Randolph the wrong way. Randolph, it must be noted, has the sense of humor of a corpse.

I like this part of the STrib article:

Jesse Crain, who is 6-0 this season and 9-0 in his career, matched the American League record for most consecutive victories to start a career for a relief pitcher.

let's make it 10, Jesse!

Oh dear. Poor Dougie. I hope it's just tough love. Maybe we should send him two packs of bubblegum instead of just one?

Willie "I Tell Grown Men They Can't Have Facial Hair" Randolph isn't big on sass. And Dougie's been sassy (not nearly what we're used to!) despite his performance. I think he's trying to retain his sass to help him get through it ("if I don't laugh, I'll cry") but Randolph sees it as disrespect to make jokes about not contributing. The guy is humorless.

I think he tolerates Pedro's sass only because Pedro backs it up with lights-out pitching. But when Randolph says "yeah, he's a real comedian..." about Dougie, it's not a compliment. It's like Ralph Kramden saying "oh, you're a riot, Alice... a regular riot" before threatening to send her to the moon. Randolph has a very "we are not amused" attitude toward Dougie. He doesn't get him at all.

I just looked at the title of last night's game thread. Since I know *zero* spanish, I thought I'd plug it into BabelFish to translate it and find out what it meant. Here's what it said:

Thread of the Game. The Giants of San Francisco in the Binoculars of Minnesota.

I'm guessing I shouldn't use BabelFish for any of my translating needs. lol.

k-bro

ha! you'll learn lots of Spanish if you read through the whole thread, k-bro.

tengo ojos mi gato y garaje con queso!

Having Daubach started in front of you is like being sent back to little league. Ouch.

My heart goes to Doug.

Especially when Daubach has been around for like 5 minutes.

K-bro - For some real babelfish-style excitement (a term I use loosely, if not incorrectly altogether) try out "Lost in Translation", click my name for the link. Basically, whatever you type gets filtered through a bunch of language translators and then back into English, giving you something completely bizarre in return.

tofuu hunter - HA
Soy Cheese Romero -- HA HA
faux cobb salad -- HA HA HA HA HA

on a mildly stats-driven note, at least now Soy Cheese's stats will better reflect his level of suckitude. (a non-follower of the team watched a game with me last week and couldn't understand why I cursed when the big cheese game into the game. my friend didn't realize the ERA doesn't count inherited runners)

This is a really cute article.

http://sports.yahoo.com/mlb/news?slug=playerstrulyappreciatebr&prov=tsn&type=lgns

Skorch,

LOL. I tried:

Game Thread. San Fransico Giants at Minnesota Twins.

This is what I got:

Inizii of the giants of the game of Santo Fransisco to the prisms
binocular of the Minnesota.

k-bro

Ok. When I did it, I really spelled Francisco right.

k-bro

As a San Franciscan-cum-Minnesota, I whole-heartedly endorse this recap.

I attended the A's-Mets game last night to cheer on our lost soul, Dougie Baseball. We almost got into fisticuffs - we were in the bleechers - with representatives of Oakland's finest who did not like our appropriation of "Let's Go, Oakland" as "Doug Men, Kay Vitch".

I should note that Dougie's birthday is coming up. I have no idea why I know that!

Haplo, you are a true American hero!! BRAVO!!!

They were pretty rowdy, the Oaklanders, until Dougie "I know the way, and I'll take you there" Baseball hit a RBI Double, and then scored on a sacrifice, providing the Mets with their only offense.

Then they - the Oaklanders - knew what we were talking about. And we came together in agreement. And we ate garlic fries. And I convinced them to vote for Dustin Mohr as an NL All-Star. And, lo'...

Haplo, when Americans can come together over garlic fries and baseball, it is truly a beautiful thing.

thank you.

*sniff*

OK, here's what I think about the trolling thing. (comment deleted) And George Bush is (comment deleted), and Bill Clinton too. And about the Bitch Sox, (comment deleted), Frank Thomas can't (comment deleted) Michael Jackson, and Mark Burhle is only (comment deleted) as Stephen Hawking. And the Hennepin County Ballpark detractors can (comment deleted) in my humble opinion.

And that's more than I've said in a long time.

Haplo, you stood up for Dougie AND Dustan Mohr?! My dear, departed Twins boyfriends. Now you are truly a hero.

I don't think I;ve ever had garlic fries.

My grandfather used to say that his favorite baseball player was a genetic hybrid named "Dusty Kiel-Mohr".

Haplo, your grandfather sounds like a wise man.

ndtf -- regarding the article you posted, am I the only one who remembers when the author of that article was a Twin? We got him for Mark Redman.

Believe it or not, Dusty is still playing baseball -- I think he's with the Cololand Rockletics.

Message to everyone: Quit sniveling about "Dougie." He sucked as a Twin, and he continues to suck (even worse!) as a Met. As a Padre fan, I would be horrified to see his punchless bat in the Friar lineup.
And quit sniveling about defenseless players being jeered. Jeering and booing should be intrioduced in every workplace, as a means of reducing complacency. Sympathy is for losers.
And kw, that was one outstanding post. Solid writing, followed by an inspired take on Batgirl's fabled Legovision posts. I'm sure she's proud.
Now if only we were so clever at our blog, "Friar Faithful."

Wow, Lance. You're a real nice guy, aren't ya.

Glad you're a Padres fan.