I'm getting a complaint that the poll is no longer available...

but oh, the horror!

I will not be able to sleep now.

That is quite possibly the most entertaining thing I've ever seen.

I'm voting for Michelle. There's so much facial hair in this round that he's really the only one that looks half-decent as a woman.

And Teri? Wow. Truly horrific. (In a great way!)

Dear Ms. IC,

Please forgive the error. It should work now.

Love,
Batgirl

Had to go with Terri. There's just something about that Unibomber look...

I am going to have nightmares about Terri, lol.

I votes Little Nicki.

well, first I noticed that the Shannon Stewart picture looks relatively real, which freaked me out a little. Then I realized that you didn't have to change his name, and now I'm broken.

Well, first I noticed that the Shannon Stewart picture looks relatively real, and that kinda freaked me out. Then I realized you didn't have to change his name, and now I'm broken.

OK, the Twins are not allowed to have any more off days—or someone has to take BG's Photoshop away when they do.

I may never be able to date again...

Old Woman Mulholland. Wow. Just, wow.

Dear BG,

After piquing my prurient interest, I had to spew cheerios all over the 'puter! eeeee-uuuuuuuu. This is nasty. Just glad no wizzinators.

This just ain't right. Shivers.

But Kylie looks just like BO on Am. Idol!

I'm so glad I didn't see these pictures last night. They are down right scary! We should be voting on who looks worst. I'd have to go with Josephina Nathan on that one.

yikes.

Yikes. This is what happens when the Twins have off-days. Hopefully somebody high up in baseball will notice and fix their schedule accordingly.

I don't think I can look at the Twins players or girls the same...YUCK!

I voted for Michelle, because I like her skirt.

BTW, on behalf of the O's --

We tried. We really tried. And we only gave up runs to gopher balls and made many BitchSox whiff like they were little girls. But we must tip our cap to whatever freakin' pitching robot it is that has replaced Jon Garland.

And I don't know if any of you watched, but when Fiorentino got his very first major league hit on his very first major league at bat, he looked like a kid who had died and gone to heaven and then Miggy called out to the pitcher to toss the ball over, so he could keep it. It was so adorable, it looked like a Twins scene.

I must agree...NO MORE OFF DAYS!!!

On another note...

I woke up this morning to the guys on WCCO radio talking about the Sox.

Apparently, they're looking for respect since they've had this amazing start to their season.
Well, their fans are anyway, as I think we've seen already from a couple of threads started on the Twins board recently...

Anyway, they played a sound clip from AJ, saying that they don't care about respect, just about winning.

And then Dave Lee started to make little baby crying sounds...

Started my day off beautifully.;-D

Let's hope Friday the 13th is the beginning of that inevitable slide for them that we keep saying has got to happen...
It's gotta start sometime...

I've got this feeling, that today's the day... ;-)

OH MY!!!

Terri's got short shorts =)

I had to give the nod to Michelle - tho I do love the top that Caroline Silva is sporting!

Kylie and Josephina - need some eyebrow waxing -

Much Love
Wonder Woman

Friday the 13th indeed! Thanks to a horrifying start to the day!

We'll make a deal:
no more off days...no more Hottest Chick.

My goodness. I'm going to have to go with Michelle ... her hair is really cute and the cut works really well with the shape of her face.

Josephina's boobs appear to be about the same size as Joe's.

What, no Juanita Rincon?

Speaking of Boo, he's off suspension today, and last week there was some talk of getting a group together for tonight's game, probably in the cheap seats...did anything ever come of that? I haven't gotten my tickets for tonight yet, and if there's going to be a Boo cheering section I'd love to join!

Dear BG;

My therapist wants to know where to forward is bills to, and he was wondering if you had Michelles phone number.

I need a new therapist, since you're buying do you have any suggestions?

Maybe "Old Woman" Mullholland wouldn't be quite so shocking if she didn't have the body of a twenty year old.

I'm glad I didn't see this before I went out last night. I don't think I could have spoken to ANY woman, no matter what she looked like.

Maybe if there for some horrible reason another episode of Twins HC, BG could use clean shaven pictures. Make it a little less frightening to everyone. I'm sure women included.

Dear infield;

I too cannot wait for a snapshot of Juanita. I'm betting she's been . . . enhanced.

Caroline has such a nice smile, and Terri's bod is quite hot, but my vote has to go to Shannon. Well done!

I wonder if Twins players would find it gratifying to be thought really pretty girls (hey, you have to be pretty good-looking as a guy to look good as a chick), or whether it would be a macho point of honor to look frightening, scary, bad in this competition. If that later, Joe Nathan's self-esteem should rise even higher today.

infield, I'll be in the Cheap Seats tonight, probably in 214. dunno 'bout anyone else. I've got my blue TC cap and blue Nathan jersey today. I'll probably get there around 5:45, and I'll probably be in one of the first three rows.

any Batlings are welcome to join me! just let me know by 5:00 so I can make sure there's room around me.

I'm going with friends, who would not understand the fervor of batlings (2 of the people I've never met)But I will be with y'all in spirit. We'll be in the HR porch.

I must go scrub my eyes now. That was even more horrifying than the first HC. However, Michelle Cuddyer has such a nice smile I had to vote for her.

WE are 5 games out now, but it is important to know which Twin would be the hottest chick. The Sox just beat the team we had the horrible loss to a day earlier. The ecbc are ahead of us for the wild card. All this makes me wonder;who has the niciest legs. Al

That would be ecbs. Al

I'll be there tonight, also. I rolled the dice on the Best Available option and got section 121

Anyone want to meet at the new Foul Pole for a pregame libation? If it's not snowing, that is...

I had to go with Shannon Stewart. Even with the facial hair, she just looked good. Which is scary.

I wish I could be at the game, but I think I'd have some trouble getting to the dome by 7, considering I have to work until 5. I will also be a little late tuning in because I made plans to watch the Band Night Parade here tonight. Unless it keeps raining.

heraldguy? Where is the foul pole? this is a new thing to me.

Aurora -

The Foul Pole is a new beer garden (opened two weeks ago today) on the northwest side of the Metrodome Plaza (right by the light rail station)

It has a special place in my heart because it was built by a very good friend of mine. Now if they'd just get some better beer there (all Anheuser Busch products)

Jim Souhan's column today offers some great info on why the Twins are still in contention, ratios and numbery things I don't understand, and some good stuff on the upcoming homestand.

http://www.startribune.com/stories/150/5401042.html

He call Koskie a classy guy and that warms my heart.

Stewie is hilarious, but Terri Mulholland has me in tears!!! What a figure - it must be all those natural foods he/she eats ...

oh. my. god.

I have to point out to all the guys that are now afraid to talk to women after seeing these, how in blazes do you think us women feel about talking to men!?!?!?

I mean seriously, do you think I can look at my boyfriend, Mr Nathan, the same way EVER again!?!!? (especially since I swear it looks like he's wearing blue eyeshadow and I so hope he has better taste than that...)

And again, the most frightening is the one that looks the 'best'. Shannon is downright disturbing.

The scary thing is, if you took out the facial hair, some of those guys/girls would probably look pretty decent.

The scary thing is, if you took out the facial hair, some of those guys/girls would probably look pretty decent.

oh. my. god.

I have to point out to all the guys that are now afraid to talk to women after seeing these, how in blazes do you think us women feel about talking to men!?!?!?

I mean seriously, do you think I can look at my boyfriend, Mr Nathan, the same way EVER again!?!!? (especially since I swear it looks like he's wearing blue eyeshadow and I so hope he has better taste than that...)

And again, the most frightening is the one that looks the 'best'. Shannon is downright disturbing.

sorry for the double post but something seems to be going wrong with the whole posting experience at the moment.

I'm just sad that Caroline didn't get more votes.

*pouting*

I don't know if anyone's seen this week's power rankings on ESPN.com yet, but if you haven't, click my name for the link.

hahahahahahahahah
*falls off chair from laffing**
that is freaking hilarious. they are much much worse than the last bunch...Josephina Nathan may give me nightmares!!

this group is disturbing on a whole new level... and yeah, nathan? eeeek!

All I can say is I'm glad my boyfriends were in the first round and I've blocked all memories of it out of my mind. I may need to drink heavily to erase the memories of this one. I emailed it to my sister, her response was, "I think I threw up in my mouth a little."

BG -
Just this week I have settled back into a normal sleep routine - I had 2 weeks of nightmares and wierd freaky dreams from H.C.R1. This is going to be a major setback. I don't expect to get a decent night sleep for the entire Twins homestand. At least I have Clear the Bases and Batkitty Detective to help me fight the demons at 3:30am.

Freaking hilarious....Good thing I haven't seen I don't know who makes the best girl out of the round..I'll just say LNP because...Its LNP and he's my favorite fielder. I heart him

"I mean seriously, do you think I can look at my boyfriend, Mr Nathan, the same way EVER again!?!!? (especially since I swear it looks like he's wearing blue eyeshadow and I so hope he has better taste than that...)"

Hee! CapitalBabs, when I was new to makeup, I thought blue eye shadow was IT -- didn't know any better. Maybe that's true for Mr. Nathan, too.

And are we all OK with being temporary O's fans? Just for the weekend? (Exception for CarrieIC, of course).

HILARIOUS...I'd have to say LNP because..Its LNP and he's my favorite position player. I heart him

I have no problems with cheering for the Orioles this weekend, or any other time they are playing a team other than the Twins. Honestly, I'm sick of the Yankees and Red Sox getting all the AL East love, so I will happily cheer for the Orioles to win the division this year.

More love for the doctor! Click my name for the article.

http://www.startribune.com/stories/509/5401008.html

yankees???????

ndtf - I love that they called him Dr. Morneau

say-rah - ???????

I think they ripped off Batgirl when they said "Welcome to the island of Dr. Morneau".

Did you all see what ESPN's Power Rankings said?

Minnesota Twins: With all due respect to Mark Teixeira, Richie Sexson and Paul Konerko, Justin Morneau is the AL's best first baseman.

Twins were ranked 6th, Bitch Sox were ranked first. Click my name for the full story.

i thought we in the midwest were immune to the yankees-centric mentality that plagues so much of the east coast media. now the strib is calling texas the yankees? seriously.

Say Rah-
What I got out of that was that they were comparing Soriano now to Soriano when he played for the Yankees. Take a deep breath. It will be all right. Go to your happy place...

Really. Horrifying. Truly. I go to sleep here in about 45 minutes, and i swear i'm going to be haunted by Josephine Nathan. MY GOODNESS that just wasn't right. While these days off are never that great, and the twins ladies are never anything but scary, i can't wait for the round to come out when the coaches get a chance. I dont know why. Its like a a bad car accident, you hate that it happened, but if you drive by, you gotta look.

On another note, Shannon Stewart (neat how that doesn't seem weird calling him that) has got some guns. Sorry, just calling it like i see it.

Tinger,

Good way of putting it. I should have known from last time that I shouldn't have clicked. But I did anyway.

Must find the brain bleach...

MK

ndtf,

Go back to the Soriano bit and look at the headline. :)

Wow, I didn't even catch that! That's terrible. Not quite as bad as Josephina Nathan, but still... Friday the 13th strikes again!

Caroline, Josephina, and Kylie have sufficiently scared me for the next year.

when I looked at these at home, Tumbleweed had been all curled up nicely in my lap... and when she saw what Batgirl did to Little Nicky Punto, well... I'd rather not relive it.

Batgirl, I hope you can live with yourself after scarring a poor little kitty cat for life.

I mean, pink?! honestly... ;)

I, too, find these deeply disturbing. I am beginning to dread the All-Star Break.

While I like that Josephina Nathan has the girl next door look going on, I can tell Terri Mulholland has a dirty little secret. She is quite a little treat!!

Big ups to Shannon's sweet hip hop thighs!

kafumbly,

I'd appreciate it if you'd save two seats. I won't get there until after 6:00, and the hubby's on call so he'll probably arrive after I do. 214, right?

*runs away and hides*

That is really scarry. Especially Miss Mullholland. I'm going to have nightmares about that, I can tell.

Speaking of Justina... er... Justin Morneau, I have a question that perhaps some of you genius Batlings will be able to answer. Why doesn't he qualify for the league leaders in batting average? I read in a Strib article that he doesn't, but it didn't say why. Anyone know?

He hasn't had enough at-bats to qualify, because he missed so much time with that concussion.

Belle: You have to have a certain number of at bats (not sure how many, exactly) to qualify for the official league leaders list for BA. Justin(a) doesn't have that yet because he was out for two weeks.

infield,

yep! I've got a long-sleeve blue shirt under my jersey, and I'll have my brown hair pulled back "mullet-style" under my hat. and so you don't have to feel silly calling out for kafumbly, my actual name is Bobbi. :)

Aww c'mon. You know LNP makes the finest looking woman in this group ... I bet (s)he breaks a lot of hearts. Shannon, on the other hand, looks like (s)he breaks strictly arms and legs. For money.

Okay, I see. I figured it was something like that, but wasn't smart enough to figure it out. From looking at the stats, my guess is that it's somewhere around 80 or 90. Thanks for the help, infield and Nick!

Teresa Joanna all the way. Unless you likes the booty, then its all about Shannon.

So not many people have mentioned Kylie Lohse...and she is incredibly scary looking...her makeup makes it look like she has a black eye!

On another note, I too will be at the game tonight...not sure where I'm sitting because we usually buy seats from a scalper.

Gonna go see Joe Mauer tomorrow :)

I'm upset because I think Teri Mulholland just might be cuter than me. He's only a year older. *sigh*

k-bro

I meant "she".

k-bro

I forget the exact formula (and am too lazy to look it up), but batting Avg leaders are required to have something like 2.9 at-bats for every game their team has played.

Molly,
Buying from scalpers hurts the Twins economically. Think about it. Those tickets have already been purchased; buying them from the scalper only benefits the scalper. Not to take some false moral high ground, but I always buy my tickets from the ticket windows. I consider ti my littl epart to keep the team as financially viable as possible.

And I plan on being in the right field cheap seats tonight, as low down as possible (probably 214), with Santana/Nathan campaign shirt. And if I have time, a "welcome back Boo sign".

It's 3.1 at-bats for every game the team has played. (from mlb.com)

Kafumbly & Infield, you guys are going to sit in my section? I'll have to keep an eye out for you guys and say hello. I'll have a Twins batting jacket on and my baseball cap, so if you see me wave or yell.

double-a are you staying for the game tonight?

Nevermind, you just answered my question double-a.

I have been thinking about going tonight. I'm trying to convince my friend to come, but she's not a real fan of the game and she'll get really angry if I start scoring it. Anyways, perhaps I'll go alone and see if I can find you guys. Maybe I'll see you there.

Batgirl, I thought we had agreed to never do this again. And you apologized profusely the first time, but now I question your sincerity. Just plain gross.

Not yet mentioned, but Josephina Nathan looks like Jar Jar Binks.

Aw, jeez, Ryan, you just had to go and make it worse. S/he does indeed look like Jar Jar.

JarJar, ha! Say, has anyone else heard when that new Star Wars movie is supposed to open? I've had a dickens of a time trying to get some information.

And Shannon has pretty eyes, no?

E, I shall be scoring, too, so do not feel alone! I'll try to save a third spot in case you join infield, her husband, and me.

double-a according to Strib it opens Thursday 05/19/2005

double-a, it opens May 19, but there's a midnight showing on May 18, which is technically the 19th... but they list it on the 18th.

click my name for the STrib listing to find a movie theater near you. :)

heh... look for Boo to have the Barbie backpack tonight:

Who inherits the backpack now [that Baker's been sent down]?

"It goes back to [Matt] Guerrier," closer Joe Nathan said. "We might have to give it to Juan for one day though."

So if Boo gets the backpack tonight, will he sneak Tumbleweed out to the bullpen in it? I'd think so after all they've been through together.

k-bro

ndtf, I think it's 3.1 Plate appearances a game, not at bats.

k-bro, I should hope so! it would only be right. he may need her for emotional support, anyway.

(if anyone's sitting down there and has a camera, shoot a pic of Juan with the backpack and email it to me. I shall be ever so thankful.)

HooliganKat and kafumbly,
I'll have on a grey "away" Boo jersey about twenty sizes too big for me over a dark grey long sleeve shirt and I'll be toting a big ol' blue Twins backpack. I'll be looking for kafumbly's Nathan jersey, 'cause that sounds easiest to spot!

double-a,
Oh, do bring a sign! I don't have time to make one. :(

Auugggghh, my eyes!!!

Those goatees really make a fashion sense...

Those goatees really make a fashion statement...

Allow me to make a prediction: The Twins Hottest Chick contest will be more clever and worthwhile than will Episode Three: Return of the Clones. It's just going to be really bad. And I LIKE Star Wars. I have no hope for this movie. It'll stink and make a ton of cash and, well, you know the story.

By the way, I don't know if this was posted on BG.com, but I saw it somewhere, and thought I'd put the link here...you know, just in case you thought that Star Wars was out to do more than make a buck:

http://shop.starwars.com/catalog/product.xml?product_id=1890

That's a pretty damning indictment, no? Clicking on my name may also produce the desired effect of going to the above page...

I was playing with chicks like this before most batlings were born. Now my dreams are really gonna be confuzzled. I can't wait for the next off day! Finally, a way to forget!

Glad I missed round 1, don't know if have breakfast now :)

YankeeFan

YankeeFan, you can see round 1 here:

http://www.bat-girl.com/archives/000804.html

now you don't have to feel left out. :)

wow BG u have dun it again this time it is horrific i cant look at it again

My vote goes to Michelle

please dont do it again....please

Fiday the 13th better be the end of the BitchSox and the start of a wonderful Twins come back to win the division.

Go TWINS!

Sunday's game was great!