I'm watching the O's-Detroit game, and the announcers keep talking about Pudge Rodriguez. I had no idea that "Pudge" was his official nickname -- my first reaction was "Whoa, they've been reading BatGirl!"

Have you seen The Green Mile? Have you noticed how Kyle tends to become Lyle whenever the rest of the team is playing badly? I think he takes other players suffering INTO himself; I think he acts as a focus for their instability.

Prediction: Kyle plays great for 6 innings, and in the 7th loads the bases and starts beaning people. Super hard. Then black fly-like things start streaming from his mouth. And Gardy pulls him one run too late.

Very dark, Haplo, but eerily accurate...

Just gotta say, I love Dark Starr on 'CCO late nights, but i've lost a small amount of respect for the man due to the fact that he proclaims himself "Corky Miller's biggest fan". Not that that takes much...

Oh, yeah, game tonight... i say we do to the Bitch Sox what the Cubs are doing to the Reds.. having their way with them to the point that the pitcher only missed a home run by about a foot...

Oh please, Lord, Bring Kyle to the park and leave Lyle at home!!!

Amen.

Batgirl is a genius with nicknames, and she'd do better for Ivan Rodriguez than "Pudge" (Lotsa Catchers are called Pudge) and even better than "I Rod." I don't want it to be a mean nickname, though, cause I happen to like the guy. His leadership on the Marlins team that won the WS was downright inspiring. His willingness to go from a World Series champion to the desparate Tiggers also says good stuff about his character. He's just about my favorite non-Twin player, especially now that the Big U has gone over to the dark side.

Anyway, on to Comiskey. It's a pathetic ballpark in the middle of an industrial wasteleand and has no charm and attracts the worst elements. Sometimes fans jump out on the field and attack the coaches and the players. Now that's a venue for quality baseball. I want to see Torii Hunter sharpen his spikes "Ty Cobb" their new catcher (what's his name again? I know it's some hard-to-spell Polish name....)

U.S. Bitchular Field.

You slay me Batgirl...you really do. ;-D

Did Gardy just call Dazzle "Pookum"?

Kurtis, I don't mean to be argumentative, and I actually am also a fan of Pudge, but I don't see how choosing to go to the Tiggers shows good character. Didn't he end up with the team that offered the most money, rather than the team he just led to the WS title?

Oh this is a good sign, i turn on the MLB TV and there's a Minnesota Twin teaching kids to read. Maybe we'll even get Dick and Bert!

I dont know how much attention i'll be able to pay to the game here.. i am eating cracker jacks, and the suprise inside is just too much! Holy crap its awesome. I love Cracker Jacks, although this is the first time i've ever actually eaten them WHILE watching baseball...GO TWINS!

Tinger, we're all in suspense!

Why does MLB.TV hate me? i just watched 15 minutes of Florida vs. Washington without it skipping once, now i turn on the twins, and its skipped three times and buffered 4 allready...

whoohoo! stewie on 1st! lets go J.B.!

Goodness, the Yankees scored 13 runs in the second inning against the Rays.

COOL! its this little piece of paper with a face on each side, and you fold the paper along the perforated lines, each time making a different face, but each face with a striking resemblance to Sloth!!!

BABY RUUUUUUTH!?!?!?!

MLB.TV inquiry:
If you pay the $15 per month does that get you 4 weeks or only until the end of the current month? Any info would be much appreciated.

Horray for Fox Sports MN on mlb.tv!!! This is a first since the seattle series. Lets go Joe! Beat up on Contreras!

Its the Chairman's birthday tomorrow, but its allready tomorrow here...

HAPPY BIRTHDAY MR CHAIRMAN!!!

OH what a suprise! Not one, but TWO PRIZES in my cracker jacks!!! (Go Twins)

It's 15 for a month from when u sign up, then it auto-renews until u cancell.

ALRIGHT lets go LeRoy! Bring Stewie home!

Thanks for the help!

Did Gardy just call Dazzle "Pookum"?

Posted by: Batgirl at April 18, 2005 06:59 PM

---

I thought I heard that tooo. hahahaha

Contreras is having a Career Day... thats what i like to see!

Juiced for Chicago's most hated Twin.... Man, talk about a highlight reel opportunity....

Bases loaded with 1 out! Lets break it open early.

Bert: (to the Boo's directed at Torii) "Thats good. Its good to get booed on the road."

Good insight, Bert... thats why we love ya!

Funny, Gameday on mlb.com is about 20 sec AHEAD of FSN north.

NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!

%#*@&#&((@#(&%$(%@)@($*@#&@&^!&(@!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

ARGH! Loading the bases without scoring sucks!

Yeah, that sucks, but that was a long first inning, with a whole crap-load of pitches. Middle relievers, here we come...

this strikezone is about as opposite of the one in Cleveland as you can get!

Torii's good in the field, but they just made that WAY to easy for him (not that i mind)

You know, since Contreras loaded the bases while he was fresh, I still a warm fuzzy feeling about this game...

Hmmm...did Kyle actually get a lead off man out?

*shock*

Yeah, unless sportsline's messed up, Contreras had to throw 34 pitches that inning, hehehe

sure is nice not seeing LeRoy and his big sandwich-eatin-ass over at first tonight! (And Corky (Corky) Miller not in the game...

what the.. i thought we were done with that First Inning home run Boo-hunk... dammit Lyle, stay away!

Loading the bases and failing to score sucks even more when the next half-inning sees a solo homer by the opposition.
Crap crap crap crap crap crap crap!

Stupid Bitch Everett

$#^^%ing Carl Everett...Kyle, dont let Lyle have any more guest pitches. Sounds like we get to make another comeback win out of this.

Plus, of those 34 pitches, only 20 were strikes. Sounds like Contreras isn't going to be lasting too long this evening.

Good recovery Kyle... i feel better allready...

Dear Contreras,

Please continue to suck.

Thanks,
Stacy

DO NOT HIT LIL SWEETCHEEKS!!!!!

Oh, no.

It's only Lyle if that solo homer meant crushing despair, complete inability to find the strike zone, and scoring half a dozen more before finally being pulled before getting another out. Remarkably, Kyle looked pretty good getting out of the rest of that inning.

mean as it is, and as much as i love Guzzie and Koskie, they sure are suckin ass this year with thier new teams!

Imagine that, Jones, hit by a pitch? get out...

Jacque! Jacque, baby, are you okay? Where did they hit him?

OWWWWW!!! That was right off his knee...
Lets lad the bases again and make something of it this time

Shh...shhhh...it's okay Carrie. He's fine. It was in the leg, but he's fine.

Lil' Sweetcheeks is ok, i think he just stayed down and put on a little act to get our boys pissed...

Look out Contreras, this could be a long inning...

*nods and rocks back and forth, attempting to slow heartrate*

Just looking at his picture on MLB, but are we sure Jose Contreras didnt play Cerrano in Major League?

Boston,

If they're having this much of a problem with the bases loaded, I'd rather not see it. Runners on the corners with 1 out, I can handle...

MK

SILVA SIGHTING!!

wow... didn't realize how nice that would feel to see him there...

Posednick looked lost on that fly ball, nice basket catch... stupid bitchsox

Nice steal there, JJ!!

I guess Jones' knee is alright

How bout 2nd and 3rd? No DP opportunity there.

Yup, Lil' sweetcheeks is lookin fine... nice steal.

Oh, how I love Bitch Sox defense.

HECK
YES
!!

I know it's not related to this game, but Dontrelle Willis just completed his 23rd consecutive shutout inning to start the season. The kid is insane.

Also, I laugh at Aaron Rowand trying to throw like Sweetcheeks.

Woo-hoo!

Nice hit cuddles, Comeback complete. Now lets take the lead.

WHOOHOO! Score. nice poke, Cuddy.

C'mon Rivas!!

50 pitches by midway through the 2nd...I like it

Ice, thanks for the update.. i knew that was a good pickup when i saw him as a free agent in fantasy ball...

Holy moses, Luis watch out for that guy, he's gonna try to hit you next!

Damn.

Come on, Bartlett!

Just signing in while sitting in class. Good observation on the pitch count - I LOVE SMALL BALL!

How bout a little somethin somethin Bartlett??!!

Nice Running Stewie. Lets get cuddles in for the lead

Bah

Boston,

That works, too...

MK

PlayhouseG: Well, there are high-caliber players that won't go to a team in the hunt. A Rod wouldn't have gone to the Tigers, for example. Obviously money talks, but I like to believe that Pudge wanted to help out the young Tiggers. He listens to Yanni, so we know he's sensitive.

Keep running those counts up, fouling off pitches, score a run or two, he'll be gone by the 5th...

1-2-3
good job kyle

Hey, a whole inning of Kyle!

At least Rivas is lookin hot in the outfield, even though he's up there all strikin out and stuff... lets see if we can't get another 30 pitch inning out of Contreras

Time for the Chairman to go YARD!

We dont even have to foul off all that many pitches, Contreras keeps throwing a bunch of balls when he has 2 strikes. If we can do some more damage this inning, we could chase him.

I LOVE when the Chairman pulls that stunt... its just pretty!

Or bunt. Knee must be fine to bunt for a single.

I've heard it argued that Mauer's knowledge of the game is demonstrated in the artistic bunt down the 3rd base line with the infield shifted to the left...

how many times HASN'T Contreras been ahead 0-2 before throwing about 3 balls?

i'm getting sick of typing Contreras. Dude needs a nickname.

How about Conti?

Well, they don't call him "The Chairman" for nothing.

conti.. yup, that'll do. short, sweet, and he still sucks. perfect.

How about 3rd inning, after how long it takes him to throw 100 pitches

Jonesy is all sorts of pissed about that whole gettin hit gig.. he's not gonna get out again tonight

Ahhh, Bert I missed you. Now what the hell are you talking about?

They *DID* get the memo about leaving guys on base, didn't they? Someone needs to send that one again, in case some of them didn't catch it.

Dang, he got out of that one with only 13 pitches. Maybe He'll make it 5 after all. OK, Kyle lets get through the 3rd now.

Yeah, Flip, what was all that Coors Light talk? you just can't beat Bert Commentary.

Way to battle back, Kyle! now finish him off!

Tinger: HA!

Im not really sure what all the Coors Light Talk was about, but its making me thirsty.

2 down 1 to go for the inning. Come on Kyle

Gotta love that... Uribe takes one off the handle of the bat, and all Bert can do is Laugh at him. NICE.

Making YOU thirsty!? i haven't had a drink since December! They don't have beer in Iraq!

7 straight for Kyle...How bout a you thought you had a chance but you can go sit down now, Bitch!

oh, and did anyone else find that T-wolves commercial to be a little wrong?

Tinger - if you can tell us, what unit are you with?

AFLAC answer: Gonna take a guess with Carl Crawford.

man, Tinger.. I keep forgetting that you are checking in from over there. No beer here in the house but here's to you anyway *raises my bottle of hard cider*

gotta say it is good to see Kyle tonight.. *smile*

Dear Mr. Rivas,

Please don't suck in this at bat. Get a hit.

-Tinger

"I want to see Torii Hunter sharpen his spikes "Ty Cobb" their new catcher (what's his name again? I know it's some hard-to-spell Polish name....)"

The White Sox's new catcher is former Twin A.J. Pierzynski. But even though he's gone over to the enemy, I hope that Torii will spare him. ;)

75 pitches Conti, you're on borrowed time...

Um...guys? Why are you making Contreras look good? He couldn't find the strike zone with OnStar, and yet he has himself a 1-1 tie game.

Charlie 1-151

TINGER!! It's me - Chaplain Winn - SMALL WORLD!!

I was with you at Dix before you guys deployed - WHAT'S UP!!

i HATE warning track power sometimes... like right there. Where's the wind when you need it?

someone find Lyle, He must have made off with the good bats and replaced them with the ass-bats again.

Well holy crap! How ya doin sir? drop me an email tinger_3 AT hotmail dot com, i'll update ya!

Tinger,

Before looking back and catching who you were responding to, I caught myself thinking "Damn, I don't know who this Charlie guy is, but his record *sucks*."

Maybe I shouldn't have admitted that, but still.

MK

LOL HA! Mk- good humor

Loshe is doing well... Alot better than I expected, actually. I'm hopeful that he'll be able to recover from a rough season last year.

I'm well! I'm glad to be sitting in the stands with you tonight, you're a warrior and we're proud of you! I'll enjoy the game more knowing you're out there ;)

*sitting back down now*

Why couldn't Stewart's ball have gone out? Merde!

Dear Tinger,

I edited your comment so the spambots don't pick up your e-mail address!

Sincerely,
BG

That Iguchi guy, much as i hate him, he's on friggin fire this year.

Good. Everett is a punk bitch anyway.

thanks BG. youre my new hero.

Thank you Bat-Cop!

Nice pickoff! Woo!

NICE! good thing his baserunning isn't as good as hit hitting!

Nice Pick, Kyle

Nice Pickoff, Dont see those too often anymore.

At least the hits haven't been hard ... oh wait...

No spam for the Batlings! Not on my watch.

The worst part about being late to catch one of these games is that I miss an inning trying to catch up on what y'all have been saying.

Hey people.

It looks like our boys are hanging in there, but we could be doing better. And I'm tired of our guys getting hit all the time.

I hope Contreras throws another 20 pitches this inning so we can get to the bullpen already.

OOOOOH GOODY! i wonder who the "special guest in the booth" is going to be?

*Yelling as though i'm looking for my lost puppy*
BATS!!!! COME HERE FELLAS!!! COME ON BATS!!! COME ON BOYS!!!!

Hrbie!

AT- you should start setting your watch an hour early, then youll catch the beginning of the game.

Herbie's talking more here than on "his" show.

hahaha
"What brings you to Chicago?"

"My Visa card"

classic

Tinger, I've got THINGS to DO. These classes don't just pass themselves, you know... besides, I know our boys will make it exciting for me in the later innings.

Fingers crossed, Mr. T.

AHHHH Hrbie in the house.. thats gotta be lucky for us... attaboy JB!! way to come through!

holy crap Hrbie's just a little guy back in the day!

TiB: he actually said that? that's funny stuff.

Have I mentioned that I LOVE bartlett's plate discipline? He and Mauer are.. well, whatever they are, I want more of it.

Nice Bloop single there Bartlett. good to see you on base finally.

WOOT! break that DP into no outs!!!

Oh how I love Kent Hrbek....:-D

And Contreras is sucking...it's great! :-D

GO TWINS!!!

Isn't that the same crap that happened the other day? where they went to second when they shouldn't have,and then we ended up safe? i like that play.... whoa, that was a close one

OK, this is where Conti finally gives it up.

"Thank you Chairman, may I have another??!"

Bartlett gets 7 pitches out of Conti, and then raps a single...b-e-a-utiful

Now would be a good time to continue with that three-run homer thing we've been doing lately...

and we've broken the 90-pitch mark. No bullpen activity yet though(more fun for the Twins?).

Is LeRoy incapable of hitting the other way?

Runner moves up, we'll take it - work that count Matty...

Yeah, I think it's about time Conti's ERA reflect the sucking he's been doing tonight.

WHAT??? A DP???? MATTY, NO.

Sorry, didn't mean to blow up.

!*@#&$()@#*@*$(@#)@$(#$^%%)*#*%!!!!!!!!!!!

Dang it LeCroy, WHY?!?!?!??

HAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!!!!!!!!
BALK!

a Balk!?!??!!? holy cow.. I can't remember the last time I saw that called during a game..

sheesh.. what a way to score a run.

BALK!!!! You don't see that every day! Awesome.

What just happened?

I mean, yeah we got a run...but what happened?

Balk?

Hahahahahahaha!

Chicago Manger: "Let's see...warm someone up in the pen, or let Contilezza balk in a run?"

A BALK!? are you kidding me? man, thats WORSE than losing the game on an HBP!

BW, I'm glad you called him Contileeza. My mind went there too, and it's the tops.

Ok stats freaks, when was the last a Twins had a pickoff and the Twins scored on a balk in the same game?? Possibly a first??

Balk! Maniacal laughter from the St. Paul burbs follows.

Babs, no worse than hitting a guy with the bases loaded, right? That may be a little too fresh a wound, though.

Will someone please just explain to me what happened? MLB Gameday just does not do the trick.

I feel like an idiot...what's a balk?

And now the bullpen is going. We're at the 100 mark on Jaque's first pitch.

AT - it had to be done!

Does anyone know what Conteras did on that balk? I didn't see anything, and Dick and Bert seemed to be stumped as well.

I'll take it though.

Ozzie's gotta be about ready to lose it here...

I'm glad Conti is sucking ass, it makes the game so much fun to watch

WHOA Torii, that was close... ok steal on him now...

Could this inning be more eventful? I mean I guess so, but look at all the fun in one little inning.

ok.. now I am just giggling my butt off over here.. Go Torii!

*giggle*

Hot DAMN!

I'll take this kind of "small ball"! Way to go Torii!!

Especially when A.J. fires the ball into center field...

The Baseball Gods have smiled upon the Minnesota Twins and realized their mistake of allowing JC to bean in a run. Do not question the Baseball Gods.

A balk is...a balk is.... well...

Candace: Wikipedia says: In baseball, a pitcher may commit a number of illegal motions or actions which constitute a balk. When a balk occurs, immediate ensuing play is allowed to continue. If each baserunner advances one base safely, the infraction is ignored. Otherwise, the balk is called "no pitch" and each runner is awarded one base. Thus, we're up by one.

Im not really sure why that was a Balk.
On a Balk all the runners advance

Nice job sweetcheeks!!!!

THE WHEELS ON THE SOX GO FALLING OFF! FALLING OFF! FALLING OFF!!!!!!

Balk...error...wild pitch...mmm...

WHOOHOO!! Torii just stole his way all the way around... damn, i can't believe he got my memo that fast.

Conti has gotta be gone here, there's no way ozzie can put up with that.... much as i'd hate to see him go..

Holy!!!! The Bitchsox are super mad after that!!! Heeheeeee!

and he does some MORE!! Only Torii would decide that running over the catcher is old school. The new fad is taking out the pitcher...

Do these last 2 runs count as "playing the game the right way"? I hope so, and as such I hope the southsiders are eating their hearts out right now.

Bye Conti!!

BW: Thank you:) I feel like an idiot not knowing...but now that I do know...I feel better...

And this inning just keeps getting better and better:)

Playing the game the right way, AT? It all depends on which team you're talking about...

Hmmm, the chicago fans are booing Conti on the way off... HA! and Bert throws in a quick "thats not good"

Its the little things that make you love a guy i guess...

where i was going there is, i'm sad to see him leave, he was just so damned entertaining there!

Cotts, you ain't got sh*t. We're gonna light you up...

Tinger, Bert's knack for understatement is a thing of beauty, you're right about that.

The "Thats not good" was beautiful. now lets hammer cotts.

One of the sweetest phrases ever: "and the wheels are coming off for the White Sox."

My boyfriend just noted that if we were playing Twingo, we'd be doing really good right now.

Line on Cotts in 2005: 3.1 IP, 4 hits, 3 R, 3 ER, 4 BB.

Not looking good ChiSox...

Captina, that's some good old AL Central trash talk you've got there. Keep up the good work.

what are the odds that jonesy tries that Torii trick?

That was beautiful.

Just think... if our beloved tennis pro hadn't GiDP, we might have had even more fun that inning. sigh...

AT,

Thanks. I've been drinking.

Captina

So, I'm going to school in NW Indiana and the only time I see the Twins is when they are on the Chicago Sports Network playing the Bitch Sox, and needless to say, I get the Bitch Sox commentator (They arent on here tonight). But anywho, last week, they were comparing the Bitch Sox rotation to the mid-nineties Braves. I dont think Tom Glavine threw 100 pitches in less than 5 innings or balked in, and wild pitched in a run very often, and probably never in the same game...

Thank you, A.J.!

For those of you wanting more info on the evasive "balk", here's a great site with all the answers: http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Balk

Captina, that was some beauty trash talk... gotta love it!!!

Captina, keep up the good work. How many drinking references have we had already tonight? Nothing like a good, rowdy Monday to start a week off right...

I think I'll have a Guinness in honor of the balk-error-wild pitch scoring sequence.

BW, excellent resource management.

I can almost say the same for Kyle tonight... stupid AJ.

Ryan, great post, and great site - loved the Twins/Sox recap from 4/13!

Awesome, Now you have Captina trash talking the Bitchsox, AND the manager trash talking Frank Thomas. Ok, AJ, time for a strikeout...

Belle -

I was kidding about not remembering AJ's name. I used to even know how to spell it, what with the scorecard and all

Love the run by Torii - Balk, Walk, Stolen Base, Err, Wild Pitch. No balls were put in play in that stretch, and Hunter's run was scored without a ball being put in play by a Twin. How often does that happen? He did let me down by not running past the base to spike Pierzynski. (Kidding, kidding.)

- Kurtis

Dear A.J.,

when you were with the twins, you would have struck out. Where's the love?

-Tinger

Damnit Kyle, what did i tell you about Lyle's Guest pitches. Tell him to save it for games against KC and TB.

Crede, you just got lucky sucker. That *barely* made it over the fence... It won't happen again.

Dear Joe Crede,

That wasn't love. Besides, i was talking to A.J. You're not A.J. Ass.

Hope you burn in Hell.
-Tinger

Hey Kyle, stop imitating Conti, OK? Or has he already turned to Lyle? nuts.

NUTS!! What the heck was that??!

I hate you so much, Lyle. We were munching on Ambrosia, Lyle, and you gave us over to Hades.

I hate you... so... much...

Crede - merde!

Craptacular!

Why oh why does Kyle do that?!? We get a lead - he either loses it or lets the other guys get back in the game

sigh.........

Now my head hurts =(

Much Love
Wonder Woman

Reference: Post (this thread) by Haplo at April 18, 2005 06:31 PM

Lyle showed up an inning early!!

Hey Tinger, let's not start throwing the hellfire around so quick, eh? I mean, the poor guy already has to play for the southsiders, and as such he's maybe already as close to Hades as anyone deserves to be.

I do affirm, however, your previous epithet for him.

I forgot how Lyle seems to give up a two run lead on the very next inning.

what the hell is bert talking about now? all i heard was "you can't steal first, you have to hit your way on"

"Are those flies buzzing around the mound, Dazzle?"

BW Thanks for the compliment...

And all I can say after living among these Bitch Sox faithful and listening to them complain is... wtf? Joe Crede doesn't hit homeruns!

Didn't mean to blow up. Just got a little upset there. I've regained composure. I still hate Joe Crede. And Corky (corky) Miller. We lose this game, i'll find a way to pin it on him...

That's Batgirl's sister-in-law in the Hartford Commons commercial. With another man!

What I meant to say earlier is that we'd be doing really WELL at Twingo (not GOOD). Sigh.

Let's talk more about how things fell apart for the White Sox. Yup. I'd like to see more falling apart, please.

Oooh, a "happy face" circle.

Don't mean to get greedy here, but i think Mr. Cuddyer deserves another RBI. Rip this meat, Mikey!

Tinger
Kyle was wondering if the Corky on the Twins is the Corky from Life Goes On. Kyle loses concentration. Corky gets the blame. Problem solved.

I was typing a nice rip on Cotts, but now he's gone. lucky punk.

Then again, walks seem to be working for us today...

you know.. I really should start paying more attention to the broadcast rules and such... Did Dick just say they aren't broadcasting on Wednesday or Thursday!?

Anyone know what the heck is up with that!??!?!

Twinkies fans.... just wanted to say good series we got going on so far this season. With the new guys we got on the southside (I am indeed a diehard White Sox fan), I really don't fear the Twinkies anymore. Last season, yes. After that Torii (cheapshot) Hunter move on Jamie Burke (and injuries upon injuries) our season went down the drain and yours shot way up. I do respect your team for what they've accomplished under such a small budget, however, and i know that you guys are only vicious, ruthless fans because there's no hockey right now. Oh, and our stadium may be a piece of junk, but its now way as crappy as your Twinkie Dome. Go Sox.

Ryan, I think Corky from Life Goes On has a better chance at getting a hit than Corky from "Life on the Bench"

227 comments! Just want to say its super fun for me to watch with y'all.

Cuddyer isn't Sweetcheeks. Damn. And Daveman, thats not his nickname. its Sweetcheeks.

Dearest BG:

I attribute the high number of comments to a combination of spontaneous trash talking and overall alcohol consumption...

*GRIN* the fun is contagious - how goofy on a Monday night!

Well Daveman, I would respond, but I have two pennants in my ears, and one over my eyes so I couldnt read or hear what you posted..

Daveman,

I hadn't been following the Carolina Hurricanes before the lockout, so why start now?

MK

BG, thanks for giving us this space to watch games together. Here I get to watch games with my brother who's like 8 million miles away, and it's really great, so thanks.

Johan, Rivas, Jones, the new guy -- what's his name? -- Gassy Who's got the pretties goatee? I'd like to see ballplayers bring back the Tom Selleck-esque mustache.

Ryan..... touche

AHHHH.... duty calls.. i gotta run. keep cheerin for me... ATTABOY STEWIE!!!

Later people. Go Twins.

Daveman, Batgirl cautions you to be careful. You have been very close to the line. This is a Twins fan site and is expressly designed for the enjoyment of same. There is expressly no taunting. Other fans are welcome here as long as they respect the purpose of this site and do not lessen the enjoyment of the people who post here.

Sincerely,
BG

Man I like to watch Barlett hit. It's nice to see a Twin that doesn't feel a need to swing at anything near the strike zone.

Okay, let's actually do something good with this bases-loaded thing...

BG just swore very loudly.

Crap

Nope, my word was worse.

I shouldn't have said anything. I'll take the hit for this one...

Nooooooooooooooo!

The Chairman was supposed to hit a double or go yard, dammit. Or draw a balk. Something. Argh.

I don't want to see the stat on how many times we've loaded the bases and then . . . nuthin'.

You'd think my cats would be used to me jumping out of my chair swearing after all these years, but nope, they still jump and fuzz up every time.

C'mon, we've the Sox are just BEGGING to throw this game away; but we refuse to let them.

Yeah, seeing Bartlett on this CBS update thing is a little like seeing Nicky Punto (ball, ball, strike looking, ball, etc) except that it's not alike AT ALL; when Nicky's up, I'm just scared for him, but Bartlett gives me a sense of extreme confidence and calm.

BASES LOADED DP !#**$*(#%&*(@!&%*%*%*

When people rave about all the Twinkies' double-plays, this ISN'T WHAT THEY MEANT!

you know.. I really should start paying more attention to the broadcast rules and such... Did Dick just say they aren't broadcasting on Wednesday or Thursday!?

Anyone know what the heck is up with that!??!?!

---

Well, Thursday is a day game, and FSN usually does not broadcast day weekday games (to the chagrin of people work work at night >

Well, there goes my calm...

"...probably a T-Wolves game..." Do they still play?

Yep. Wednesday FSN will air the Wolves.

Batgirl SMASH

LYLE!!!!

Batgirl,

Did i not commend the Twinkies for what they've been able to do? Did i not say i had a great deal of respect for the franchise? C'mon now. I enjoy this rivalry as ever much as you do and my posts have been not of hatred, but of just having fun. If i wanted to really rip into you guys, i'd do it at the White Sox blog, Exile in Wrigleyville. You guys have won 3 straight division titles, including several world series that are way more recent than, say.... 1917! You are the top dogs, and as the top dogs, i'm just razzing you a little. I'm just a diehard fan as you are, but for the other side. That's one of the beautiful things about baseball.

Lyle has entered the building -

sonofb!itch!!!!!!!

I hate Carl Everett.

OK, I just got a little worse than "crap". Does anyone else want so badly for Kyle to be good? He just teases us. It hurts so bad...

Daveman, I suspect that BG objected most directly to that unrepeatable thing you said about Torii.

@#$%! I'm done for the night.

This means it's probably a good thing that Gameday has once again decided to warp space an

ok.. I have officially decided that I don't like Mr. Everett at all..

and yes, even though there is no playoffs, there are still Twolves games.. *sigh*

guess what kids.. I think Kyle has hit the wall. He did so well for the first 5 - mostly.

Okay, Daveman. Just checking.

Everett needs to act like he's been there before.

And Lohse... Gassner? Baker? Anyone?

Two bases loaded double plays? Thats like the lady who solved the puzzle incorrectly on Wheel of Fortune twice today. Moral of the story, you look foolish doing it, and it's really hard to win that way.

Dave, representing all batcave dwellers, we accept your clarification.

OK, what's with the pope smoke?

Dear Mr/Ms 9,

That is extremely funny.

Respectfully,
Batgirl

nice little OT there E-9!

my understanding is this - black smoke means they cast ballots and no single individual had enough to take it.

Then they will come back and do it again.

(not being Catholic my understanding is limited)

Dear Babs,

The Pope Smoke seems to have rolled onto the field.

Sincerely,
BG

9,

On papal matters, the otherwise marginal teen movie EuroTrip is surprisingly informative.

The Bat Nation (self-appointed) Minister of Information sends:

The Cardinals all take seats around the wall of the Sistine Chapel and take a ballot paper on which is written "Eligo in summum pontificem" -- "I elect as supreme Pontiff...". They then write a name on it, fold it, and then proceed one by one to approach the altar, where a chalice stands with a paten on it. They hold up their ballot high to show that they have voted, then place it on the paten, and then slide it into the chalice. The votes are then counted by the Cardinal Camerlengo and his three assistants. Each assistant reads the name, reads the name aloud, writes it down on a tally sheet and then passes it to the next assistant. The third assistant runs a needle and thread through the centre of each ballot to join them all together. The ballots are then burned, as well as all notes made. If a new Pope has been elected, the papers are burned with chemicals (it used to be wet straw) to give white smoke. Otherwise, they give off black smoke, so that the waiting crowds, and the world, know whether their new Holy Father will soon emerge from the Sistine Chapel. On 6 April 2005, it was announced that, in addition to the white smoke, the bells of St Peter's Basilica will be rung to signal the election of the new Pope. This will avoid any doubt about whether the smoke is white or black.

It's nice to know that the folks in Chicago care about the papal elections.

And yes, Babs, black smoke = no pope. Pope = white smoke + bells.

Laurel: "Is it foggy all of a sudden there or something?"

Kevin: "That's the &*!&@ smoke from celebrating Everett's homerun."

Laurel: "&%#!!"

Thanks BG!

well... that's what I get for having the computer in one room and the TV in another.

That and the fact that my sense of humor died somewhere in that inning I think... *pout*

Man I love Google...

Black smoke - no pope
White smoke - new pope
Catholicism and baseball, two peas in a pod.

And Gameday is on the fritz... what happened?

What's going on in the game? Gameday just totally failed and there's no coverage in Boston...

ESPN's appears to be working: http://sports.espn.go.com/mlb/gamecast?gameId=250418104

Torii up. 7th inning. 1 out. 5-3 Sox

same here, no websites seem to be carrying the action :(

Judging by gameday, its 4-1 right now, Bitch Sox. And I know thats not right. Probably Corky'y fault.

CBS seems to be working for updates:

http://cbs.sportsline.com/mlb/gamecenter/live/MLB_20050418_MIN@CHW

Strib seems to be keeping up

http://www.sportsnetwork.com/merge/tsnform.aspx?c=startribune&page=mlb/scores/live/log.aspx?GAMEID=13330

They just showed the last out of the Twins win over teh Bitch Sox that clinched the division last year.

Good times...

These new BK commercials are just *disturbing*

Pope smoke? Lyle poop smoke. I think I need a doobie.

>>I'm glad to be sitting in the stands with you tonight, you're a warrior and we're proud of you!

Yeah, what BW said. And, thanks.

I'm back. The home opener left me bed ridden. And with new purpose. Help Fight Ticket Illiteracy. I mean really, how hard is it to match the numbers on your ticket with the section, row and seat? Fights almost ensued. Oh, and the first row of seating is NOT a concourse. If you're too lazy to walk down and around, I'm too lazy to get up for your dumb ass so you can go through. There. We're both rude. That is all.

E-9,

Tell me about it. I do *not* want a plastic-faced guy wearing some medieval monarch's outfit knocking on my window at 8am. I don't care if he has good food for me...

MK

A pleasure to see you, mmmmarkiep.

mmmarkiep and insider - great posts! HA!

Did you all know that the final test to make sure the pope is dead is by bonking him on the forehead with a silver hammer? It's true. Makes me wonder about the Beatles tune from Abbey Road. "Made sure that he was dead." Anyway, back to baseball...

Phew, hopefully this means the bleeding has stopped. Maybe now that Kyle's out of the game, Lyle will tell castro where the good bats are and he can get the assbats out of the dugout before the twins bat.

Oh, and that was a very Radkeesque inning by Guerrier.

Good to see a nice, quiet, boring inning from Guerrier there. Now let's hope Tiffee and the boys can make this inning as un-boring as possible.

Boy, we need Dr. Morneau back...

Unrelated... well, sort of related... After the game I'm going out for my roomate's (Bitch Sox fan) 21st birthday. I'm looking for creative ideas...

TERREEE!!

Tiffe on and Cuddy do!

6 homers given up by Lyle in 17 2/3 innings. Sit down Lyle.

I suggest some Division Championship shirts from the last three years.

Get him a 6-pak of St. Paul Girl Beer!

Opps, Cuddy due. But no, he do it to the ss. Lew's due!

Boy, is anyone else's MLB audio feed of CCO going all garbled?

And Yahoo has the game stuck in a perpetual sixth inning, before the home run that Lyle gave up. I can understand how that could happen. I kind of shut off a little then, too.

But I'm having an awful time figuring out what the hell is going on!

Let's see...how about tout Crazy Carl when he comes out of the stadium after the game?!

Dang, you guys are really wearing out our pen tonight.... El Duque better have a nice LONG outing tomorrow night or we'll be in trouble

I suggest, if he hasn't watched the game, telling him that Hunter broke AJ's arm in a collision at the plate and the Twins went on to win by 10 runs. Then, report back here on what color he turned.

LOL, I can't spell tonight, must be the smoke! Far out, man! Far out, Lew............

CBS sportsline has been very consistently at or ahead of the FSN broadcast Carrie. It should help you out. The mlb.TV has also been very good as far as smooth audio goes. Picture is a bit choppy every now and then...

Dave, if we can get to Takatatstataktattsu, we should be ok!

Can't score a lead off double? Small ball, small ball, wherefore art thou, Small ball?

Word, mmark.

Word.

*peeks through fingers to check Twins/Bitchsox score and O's/Tigers score*

This is one fugly evening.

Word indeed!

All very good ideas... But BatGirl, the only championship shirts I see down here are being burned in effigy... Sometimes, I weep openly by what they say about Torii or El Presidente. But the broken arm idea... thats a good one

man... it is sure good to know that our bullpen can field but still it feels like I'm seeing that particular play a lot lately.

BW, yeah i have mixed emotions about Ozzie bringing in Shingo next inning. He's been the one true enigma this year thus far.... apart from not being able to spot his changeup (or frisbee pitch), i honestly think its a confidence thing. So if he could somehow get this save against our arch-divisional rival, it could do wonders for his.

I think Gameday went goofy after registering the Yankee-Deviled Egg score.

*tilt*

Dave: talk about your irony! You're right, this could be one of those games with meaning later in the year (something the T-Wuuvs have no concept of), and, oh by the way, 1st place is on the line.

can someone remind me why we have Corky Miller instead of Tiffee again?!?!?!?!

sheesh I hope we can keep that kid in the Bigs...

Whoa. Shaggy shaved?!? WTF??

Daveman, the consolation, for you, is that so far this year, it seems your boys have our number. At least, that's the way I see it. But, it's a long season.

Is anyone else very impressed with bartlett's range and tiffe's glove?

The Yankees won today too? Not a good sports day so far, people... STill, the Twins have time to get this one together with those patient new kids up to bat.

:puts on rally cap:

Captina feels it again. This is our inning. Bitchsox will not prevail. Bartlett singles. Meow-er hits a dinger. C'mon boys! Tie 'er up!

Finally, we got Crazy Carl out. Crazy Carl is a first ballot choice for the all-time Twins Killers team. Him, Mussina, stinkin' Mike Sweeney, who am I missing, help me out?!

Captina, I trust you. And our boys. C'mon!

Grrrrrr.....

Well, BW, I think Percival maybe just got kicked off that team, but maybe he's still on it...

BW,

Add Percvial (BT -- Before Tiggers) and Matsui...

MK

Sorry, hold off on any help with last post - IT'S RALLY TIME!!! CHAIRMAN, MATTY, TORRI, LET'S GO!

alright! way to go Joe!!!

The STrib abbreviates "Bitch Sox" WSox. How strange.

And Buehrle always seems to kill us.

Yay!!! Mauer!!!!

Must be the margarita. Only half-right. C'mon LeRoy!

The Chairman serves the People! The Chairman Serves the People!!

Loving the Chairman.

It would have been nice to see that the last time he was up, but he's still quite an impressive young man.

Dave, what's the story? Takatsu is folding like a card table! He's going to walk LeCroy too!

Out of curiousity... for all you diehard Twin fans. Other than the Sox, what teams do you guys hate the most? For Sox fans, other than the Twins there are pretty much only the Cubs (and of course the Yankees).... just wondering

*takes the pope smoke as a sign and hits her knees*

"Please, God.. just two more. Two isn't too much to ask for, is it???"

Ok, LeCroy grounded out, but there's always Torii!

BW -- as far as Mussina goes, he's a head-cased little worm. He's been lucky so far, but sooner or later our boys will hand him his own ass with two sugars and a cream, and then you will Own Him Forever.

Especially if he's pitching opposite El Presidente when it happens. That's the kind of thing that'll give him nightmares.

It's about time our veteran leaders start playing like it! C'mon Torii!

Well.... i'm definitely getting nervous. This is looking strangely similar to our first series finale against the Tribe (Shingo: gives up 3 hrs in 9th)

Carrie - that post should go on the wall -

...two sugars and a cream...priceless!

NOOOOOOO!!!!!! Curse the Sox forever!

Good game guys... lets do it again tomorrow

NOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!

Aw, hell.

*looks over the final scores*

That's it, I'm doing a shot of Absolut and going to bed.

just how much do they have to suck to get our offense moving? Just out of curiousity... not to be bitter, but dang, two bases loaded, one out situations with no scoring? This is a sad day for Twins baseball...

We really didn't want that one, did we?

Carrie, may I recommend you try Shakers Original American Vodka for your vodka-drinking needs? It's from Minnesota, and is quite nice. Maybe even too nice to do shots of, it's so nice. Hey Ryan, why don't you find some Shakers for your friend's BDay as well?

Well Dave, you got one on us. But revenge will be ours...Supernatural will not fail us, the Chief and his meniscus are on their way back, Mullholland's arm will be donated to science when he retires, and Lohse is...well, Lohse is Lohse. Maysy is back and on fire, and Radke will continue to give up HR's in the first inning and then shut 'er down. J.C. will get back on track and Nathan spells relief. Until tomorrow!!

My roomate is going to be insufferable.

BW, good rousing pep talk. and drop my boy Tinger a line (I don't much like that when he gives a "duty calls" in the middle of a Twins game...).

Bourbon goes better with baseball. Mabe because they make it in the same state they make the bats.

Ryan, be safe - thanks for representin'

You got it AT

You can say whatever you want about our record so far this year - you just can't maintain a winning record and give up the amount of Homers we're giving up. Can't be done.

At some point the other teams will figure out that they can get *multiple* guys on the basepaths, *then* hit home runs. Then, my friends, we are screwed.

Hey! Ho! Whatta ya know?
"Ding Dong" Lohse has got to go.

*mildly beligerent* Ah, screw them BitchCox. Yeah, I said Cox! We'll scrape the dugout floor with 'em tomorrow!!!! Grrr.

Thanks, Meower, for proving my psychic abilities. Bradke, don't let me down tomorrow, or I'll have to have words with you. And, trust me, you don't want that.

Sad how Gassner making his rookie debut was 43927384505684x better than Lyle.

Maybe Lyle should go to AAA...

i am very angry. As of 10 days ago, I castigated Castro{No!} "castigated". Now, I feel there are 4 other players who hurt the team more. 2 of them "play" second base, one is a catcher, and the other is a very portly individual who can't play anywhere. After another game or two,I may add the incredibly promising M. Cuddyer. He can't hit, or steal, or field. What is it he does well again? Does he not have twice as many errors as rbi? These are the frigging Bitch Sox for Crissakes. Play with a little pride. In the first and 6th, they saw 65 pitches, had 7 base runners, and scored zero runs. This is nearly impossible. Things are very, very bad. Please don't let them get very, very, very bad.

wow. Kind of early in the season to be collectively super-bitter over a one-run loss on the road.

I'd like to think they are just overly passionate about their boys.

I like it!