Poor Michael Restovich. In the space of two weeks, he's gone from being a prospective Twin to a Devil Ray to a Colorado Rockie. And it's not clear if he'll get a chance to play there. (For a good rundown of the situation there, please see Frightwig's blog at Sundappled Wood.) Indeed, Resto's journey to the major leagues has been nothing short of epic, begging the question, which god did he piss off?
I mean, here he was, this strong strapping young lad, filled with promise and possessing himself of one fine boom boom stick. His heroics on the field were legendary—none more so than during the 1997 Minnesota State High School Baseball Tournment when he led the Rochester Mayo Spartans to a great come-from-behind victory over Owatonna with a very interesting ninth-inning gambit.
Swathed in glory, Michael Restovich set sail upon the wine-dark sea heading for the Big Leagues.
But the journey was not to be as simple as he thought. Poor Restovich's ship crashed upon the shores of Rochester, New York, where an evil sorceress enslaved him, stuck him in a uniform of her dastardly International League baseball team.
The sorceress kept him for years while his very hot wife waited patiently for him to reach the Bigs.
And then finally, the gods who had so long ignored him smiled on him and told him he was out of options.
They told the sorceress she had to let him go, and so she gave him a raft and a baseball bat and sent him off in the general direction of the Big Leagues.
But the way would not be easy. During Resto's journey his raft was tossed asunder and the poor lad was washed up completely naked on a nameless shore with a broken collarbone. There, a kind young woman gave him some clothes and helped him with strength training and introduced him to her father, who thought he might be a good power hitter off the bench. The man said he could send him to the Bigs himself, for he had to keep Corky Miller on the roster, so instead he gave Resto a nice ship with a good crew, and when rose-fingered Dawn rose across the sky, he sent him out to find his own way.
But Resto's trials were not over, for he learned that before he could get to the Bigs he would have to sail where no mortal has gone before and lived to tell the tale—the Land of the Dead, a.k.a. Tampa Bay. His crew gnashed their teeth and rent their garments at the news, but there was no choice.
When Resto arrived in Tampa Bay, he found that the poor Shades condemned there for all eternity were inexorably drawn to his life force, and it creeped him out and he got the hell out of there.
Feeling as if he had escaped a terrible fate, Resto set sail again, but one night the crew decided to stop for shelter on a remote island. In the morning, Resto went to investigate the caves, where he found a terrible one-eyed monster. The monster trapped Resto and his crew and before you knew it, one of them got eaten.
But clever Resto blinded the Cyclops and the men escaped, and when they got on their ship they found calm seas and a good wind. So they set sail—destination: Colorado, home of the lovely Circe and her phat snow lodge.
And finally the Bigs? For that, we shall have to wait. Just like Resto's very hot wife.
Posted by Batgirl at April 7, 2005 10:04 PMHis story really is an epic adventure of misfortune. I'm looking forward to more adventures of dear Michael Restovich. I'm hoping it ends with him wearing a "Twins" across his chest and everyone is happy (especially Just Beth and Wee Sister).
Best wishes, Micheal!
Just Beth
Posted by: Just Beth at April 7, 2005 10:21 PMYou missed his stop up here in Edmonton...
I met him and his parents, and must say I will always cheer for him, wherever he ends up. (Unless it is in the AL Central, not in Minnesota, or NY.)
Posted by: Jacesen at April 7, 2005 11:13 PMI just hope the poor guy gets to play...somewhere.
Posted by: Stacy at April 7, 2005 11:31 PM"none more so than during the 1997 Minnesota State High School Baseball Tournment when he led the Rochester Mayo Spartans to a great come-from-behind victory over Owatonna with a very interesting ninth-inning gambit."
Hmmm...against my town. lol
As a Restovich fan (being good friends with his parents) and a classicist, I heartily approve of this representation of his journey.
Posted by: Andrew at April 7, 2005 11:58 PMAnd the fact that peanuts characters in their ghost halloween costumes haunted him makes the story that much better.
Was Owatonna really in the '97 State Tournament? I never remember them being all that great in baseball (we usually beat them down here in Northfield). Just a thought.
Also, I had the opportunity to watch Resto play a little back in '97 (although I was only 12). He hit a such a looooong foul ball home run that game that the story has become almost legendary in our town. However, he did end up going 0-3 and I think we (Northfield) won the game. :)
Posted by: Ryan at April 8, 2005 12:30 AMMy friends and I were also rooting for Resto to snag a spot on the roster... I hope he gets a starting job!
Posted by: aussie at April 8, 2005 12:57 AMMy mother's favorite story to tell about my brother's years as the Ace Starter for Bloomington Kennedy High School is of a game he played against Rochester Mayo.
Apparantly, Restovich was unable to get a hit off of my brother. (He was a crafty control pitcher. Not unlike one B. Radke.) My mother was tickled pink the day Restovich got a hit off of Randy Johnson last year.
"But he still couldn't get a hit off your brother." She announced. And generally announces whenever Restovich comes up in coversation or on TV.
I hope the man finds a place to play in the bigs. It will make my mother ever so happy.
As for Dan, my brother - rotator cuff injury while pitching in college on a scholarship. Ended a promising career. But now he's a lawyer, so....
NYB
Posted by: NY-Brian at April 8, 2005 01:19 AM>>Was Owatonna really in the '97 State Tournament? I never remember them being all that great in baseball (we usually beat them down here in Northfield). Just a thought
Posted by: NIH at April 8, 2005 08:05 AMand Ryan, how could a foul ball be a home run, and if it was in fact a home run, then Resto wouldn't have gone 0-for-3 that fateful day.
Whatever. The guy can hit and deserves a shot at the bigs.
Maybe these clubs think Resto is jinxed. I mean, within a day of his being claimed by Tampa Bay, one of their starting outfielders gets suspended. Then right after Colorado claims him, Dustan Mohr gets a freak injury. Creepy.
Posted by: JIm H. at April 8, 2005 08:17 AMPlayer Appearances Saturday 11-12:20 at the Pro Shops
Minnetonka: Lew Ford
Roseville: Justin Morneau
Apple Valley: Jason Bartlett
Anyone else going to any of these?
Posted by: Stacy at April 8, 2005 08:52 AMI'm rooting for Resto to find something too. Poor guy.
Oh and HAPPY HOME OPENER DAY!!!
Holy player appearances Batman, Justin's going to be in Roseville? I just might have to swing up there.
Posted by: HooliganKat at April 8, 2005 08:54 AMWhoever goes to see Lew in Tonka, tell him to stop sleeping with Gardy's daughter and maybe he will get to play.
Posted by: J. Lichty at April 8, 2005 09:03 AMI have to go see Lew. I originally wasn't planning on it, as I saw him at TwinsFest. But, my mom want to see him (she also saw him at TwinsFest). And, knowing my mom, I'd better go to protect Lew. I'm guessing the last thing he needs is a little old lady trying to give him a lap dance.
Not that I mind too much. He is pretty cute.
k-bro
Posted by: k-bro at April 8, 2005 09:27 AMI have just three[3] questions: 1. What did he do to win that school game? 2. Why did his crew have to rent their garments? Could they not afford to buy them? {2 Part question}, and 3. What route did they take to sail to Colorado? Having a hot wife worked for Benson and Lima, why not Resto? Whoops, that's 4. Al
Posted by: al at April 8, 2005 09:33 AMAnybody going to the game tonight? Please cheer for A.J. for me. I think he's been unfairly maligned in the past year, and I think a nice Minnesota welcome would be the right thing to do after all he did for the team when he was here. He did describe this road trip as a 'homecoming,' after all.
Posted by: sacky at April 8, 2005 10:08 AMSacky, I'll cheer for him for you, and for me. I liked him, and I still do despite the team he's playing for now. My dad lives in the Bay Area, and he always liked A.J. and was glad to have him. He felt bad for the treatment A.J. got, and I was glad that at least one Giants fan was rooting for him. But I think it's also true that A.J. has an intense personality that just won't fit in anywhere. It will be interesting to see how it goes for him in Chicago.
Posted by: Pepper at April 8, 2005 10:23 AMDearest Mr. Al,
Don't make me come over there.
Love,
Batgirl
p.s. As for Owatonna baseball, sometimes things get exaggerated in epics.
Posted by: Batgirl at April 8, 2005 10:27 AMIs that Resto's wife holding the snowboard? She IS hot!
bat-girl.com -- your source for info on hot wives! Remember Anna Benson?
Posted by: Roscoe at April 8, 2005 10:31 AMBravo! Bravo! Another entertaining epic. I very much liked the Peanuts Halloween costumes!
Posted by: soccerfan at April 8, 2005 10:50 AMI too will cheer for AJ (as long as he doesn't get any hits off our pitchers). I think it will make for a better rivalry this year.
Posted by: HooliganKat at April 8, 2005 11:28 AMI met Lima's wife on a flight out of MSP. She IS a hotty!
Posted by: pirki at April 8, 2005 11:37 AMYes, but remember the thing about Lima giving VD to some chick (not his wife)...
So, hot maybe, but, ummm, well maybe not so much after that little bit of common knowledge.
Posted by: alskntwnsfn at April 8, 2005 12:32 PMI remember when groupies were honored to catch VD from one of us ballplayers. Heck, they'd wear their rashes like Tiaras. With pride, you know!? And if a nosy reporter would ever ask em' bout it. They'd just say they ate some bad pork or something.
First the steriod scandal and now this!? What happened to the days when you could celebrate a game day with a night of drunken debauchery and several upper's?
Sincerely,
TY COBB - no, really, it's me TY COBB.
Posted by: Crusty 'Ol Ballplayer at April 8, 2005 12:38 PMI just saw Michael Cuddyer, Matty LeRoy and Gardy at the rally in Minneapolis.
Wow, DJ Cuddybear is a looker and a half. I forget how adorable our boys are.
Posted by: HooliganKat at April 8, 2005 01:15 PMMaybe if Resto hit a Homer now and then, he might not be on this journey.
Literarily yours,
YankeeFan
I think the neatest thing about The Restodyssey is that if he's ever feeling down and out of it in the mountains of Colorado, there will always be two cute pigs to pet in front of the fireplace in Circe's phat snow lodge. If that won't make everything all better, I'm not sure what will.
Good luck Mr. Restovich... I'll be following your journey from afar along with everyone else.
Posted by: Fubar at April 8, 2005 02:11 PMCorrection. Three pigs. I missed the brown one.
My sincerest and most profuse apologies,
Fubar.
Posted by: Fubar at April 8, 2005 02:12 PMHooliganKat: Was it *you* I saw in the bat-girl shirt? Alas, I was on the second floor, or I would've said tried to meet a fellow Batling! If it wasn't you, would the mysterious Batling identify herself?
And, yeah, Michael is a cutie. I'll have pictures whenever I get the film developed (yes, yes, I'll get a digital camera one of these days).
Btw, all, Gardy said he'd have to see how Justin felt today before deciding who would play first base today.
Just Beth
Posted by: Just Beth at April 8, 2005 02:14 PMNope, wasn't me in the Batgirl t-shirt, I had a Morneau t-shirt on.
I did not see a batgirl t-shirt, but then again I couldn't really take my eyes of Cuddyer's dimples.
Posted by: HooliganKat at April 8, 2005 02:27 PMWell Boo and Lew were very late to the rally in St.Paul (I so have to get a job in Mpls).
Rick Anderson blamed Boo - She-ra and I thought Boo looked like he just rolled out of bed - but he was still adorable - and of course Lew was adorkable!
I made my sister and her friends attend the rally in Mpls - they said they had a good time and as cute as Michael is - they came to the conclusion -that he has strange ears - I didn't ask =)
Now which one of you asked if Michael was single?!?
See you all at the game tonight!!!
Much Love and Peace
Wonder Woman
Good one, YankeeFan. Nice to see you haven't completely deserted us for that other team you seem to like a lot:)
Posted by: Pepper at April 8, 2005 02:46 PMMy heart belongs to Dr. Morneau, so I just like to look at Cuddy.
It was a guy who asked him if he was single, apparently he was asking for his daughter.
Posted by: HooliganKat at April 8, 2005 02:58 PMPepper - Tnkas, it is nice to feel missed... though I will be at the Stadium tomorrow. Out of town on business and the good ol' BlackBerry doesn't like BG's internet format for some reason... it's a piece of junk.
YankeeFan
P.S. What's this 2-1 garbage? Shouldn't y'all be 3-0 by now? :)
Posted by: YankeeFan at April 8, 2005 03:25 PMAh, his daugher. Sure, his daughter.
Posted by: Me at April 8, 2005 03:27 PMApparently that extra win costs an additional $100 million. What did you guys blow it on, you're 2-1 too?
Posted by: Me at April 8, 2005 03:31 PMmr. cuddy is very attractive in person...his eyes and dimples just make me weak. On the resto tip...Back in his long stint in the minors..He became friends with another surplus outfielder on the team, Dustan Mohr...I think its great that he will be able to be on the same team as dustan.
Posted by: Bojangles Crain at April 8, 2005 03:41 PMhttp://services.co.dakota.mn.us/jailsearch/details.aspx?PIN=0502819
I thought I almost stumbled upon breaking news. I am guessing that they are not brothers...
Posted by: NIH at April 8, 2005 03:51 PMSo will it just be young Bartlett and me in Apple Valley on Saturday?
Posted by: Stacy at April 8, 2005 04:07 PM"http://services.co.dakota.mn.us/jailsearch/details.aspx?PIN=0502819
I thought I almost stumbled upon breaking news. I am guessing that they are not brothers..."
Jinkies no! The Morneau bloodline is much better looking and not so criminally inclined.
Posted by: HooliganKat at April 8, 2005 04:11 PMLOL KAT! That's INCREDIBLE!!!!
Posted by: Stacy at April 8, 2005 04:32 PMRyan: You're from N-field? When did you graduate?
I like that sur-Metro has good representation here.
Posted by: Haplo at April 8, 2005 05:16 PMAlthough the criminal morneau has hockey hair relative to native candians like our beloved Doctor, he is not related.... That would be the definite black sheep of the family because of the hair alone
Posted by: Bojangles Crain at April 8, 2005 06:04 PM