Current Twins
Cisco/The Kid/The Cisco Kid=Francisco Liriano
The F-Bomb=Liriano
Boo Berry=Juan Rincon
Count Chocula=Joe Nathan
The Chairman=Joe Mauer
The Doctor/Dr. Morneau=Justin Morneau (Because his name sounds like the movie The Island of Dr. Moreau. And it'scool.
JustIncredible=Justin Morneau
Mrneau/Mrnie=Justin Morneau.
Supernatural=Johan Santana
El Presidente=Johan Santana
The Vice President/The Veep=Joe Nathan, nominated by the readers to run on Santana's ticket.
Twitchy McXanax=Joe Nathan. He gets a little nervous and twitchy.
Automatic=Joe Nathan
The Jackal=Carlos Silva, i.e. Carlos the Jackal.
Sweetcheeks=Torii Hunter
Li'l-Rod=Luis Rodriguez
LNP/Little Nicky Punto=Nick Punto
NBP/Naked Batting Practice=Mike Redmond
DJ Cuddles/Cuddles McDimpley=Michael Cuddyer. (Because he has an extensive CD collection, and he's so cuddly.
Bart=Jason Bartlett
Kubes=Jason Kubel
Shaggy=Matt Guerrier

Former Twins
T-Fat or T-Phat=Tony Batista
Little Sweetcheeks=Jacque Jones
J. Ro=J.C. Romero
LeRoy/ Big LeRoy=Matt LeCroy
Li'l Abner=Brent Abernathy.
No Balls= Grant Balfour
Mango Face=Henry Blanco