Jailbait?
Joseph?
(Or, like Mays, Nathan, Offerman, and Roa:
"Jo-Jo".)

Future of the Franchise?
Mauersota? (to reflect that he's a homeboy)

It is a sign of respect to great players when they get nicknames that are immediately recognizable and entirely apt. And in baseball the greatest tend to get nicknames that can stand alone. The Sultan of Swat. The Georgia Peach. The Yankee Clipper. The Splendid Splinter.

Here we have a potential nickname just sitting there that follows that tradition, and hopefully not entirely inappropriate -- The Twins Tower.

I'm of two minds about it. If something more catching, so to speak, is offered, I will gladly switch off. In the meantime, this strikes me as a good one to improve on.

Hart

I don't think he needs a nickname. He's just "Mauer."

joe "the messiah" mauer

My, um, friend suggested this one: MoJo. Kind of part Austin Powers superhero - part new century hip. Kind of annoying, too.

I nominate "ROY", with two possible explainations.

1. Young Mr. Mauer is likely the AL Rookie Of the Year (R.O.Y.)

2. In homage to the greatest fictional baseball player ever...Roy "The Natural" Hobbs.

Other possibilities include "The Natural", and (on a more commercial note) "Quick Swing".

"The Kid"

Batgirl -
Do you think when Joe gets a little older he may lose the Dylan McKay 90210 sideburns?!?

That's the only thing I don't like about Joe -
unfortunaley I don't have a nickname for him;-(

BTW - Love you to bits!! You make me giggle every morning when I read your page!

Yup - I am Wonder Woman :)

I just always call him Wonder Boy.

No relation to Wonder Woman, I'm sure.

Bat-Girl, You are so right that Little Joe needs a moniker with pizazz. Something that will have the fans cheering, and the teenage girls and middle-aged homosexuals doodling his name on their notebooks, with little baseball caps and hearts with arrows through them. How about something rhymey, like MauerPower? Or, harkening back to the old SuperFriends cartoon, The Wonder Twin? ("Wonder Twin power, ACTIVATE!")

boomer,
"Quick Swing" was exactly what I was looking for.
Thanks.
amr

Mau-Mau.

I suppose Big Wood is out of the question. Heheheh. Babyface Mauer? Nope, no good. I think The Kid is already taken. I kind of like MoJo. As in we need mo' Joe. A little mojo here. Twins got the MoJo working.

What about Joe Oak? Joe Mama? No no no. Sorry. 7th grade flashback. Joe Cool? Charles Schultz would be honored, I think. Mo mo kind of glides of the tongue but doesn't sound very intimidating. The Freak is used by Jevon Kearse so that's out.

I'm going to have to ruminate on this one.

You know... if we went with Mau Mau, then they could play that one part from The Oakridge Boys' 1981 runaway hit Elvira.

Now batting Joe Maaaaauuueeeeeerrrrr. *Pa oom pa pa Mau Mau*

I'll have to think about this. The rest of the Twins nicknames my roommate and I have come up with just happened.

Dougie Fresh III, esquire = Doug Mientkiewicz (Not sure how we decided that he came from such noble stock, but there you have it. On an unrelated note, in our TwinsMythos he's also got an unhealthy obsession with Rollie Fingers)

Freedom Jones = Jacque Jones (he's been carrying this one around since the tensions arose last year with France, and everything French-ish was being re-named with a more patriotic flavor)

Stinky = Luis Rivas (For no reason last year at a game against the Rangers Rivas was up to bat and I had the sudden urge to yell at him "Come on, Stinky!" It's stuck, I still yell it at him; Sometimes in my sleep, or involuntarily at inappropiate times like during review meetings.)

Smokey = Former Twin David Ortiz. (Because of his resemblence to Smokey the Bear. Look at him in the batters box, it's like they put a BoSox uniform on a bear and handed him a bat.)

I'll let you know if we come up with anything for Mauer, but by that time I'm sure something will already be decided upon by the panel of experts that is Team Batgirl.

Oh, Stinky is so appropriate. I'm gonna use it, if you don't mind.

Mau-some. eh? get it? like, "Mauer" and "Awesome" mixed to become one! eh? how about it? :-P And about his sideburns, I think they suit him just fine!

In at least one previous comment I believe I made here, I have used Mau Mau when referring to Joe Mauer, so I heartily endorse it!

Plus, I learned from a kind friend, who didn't kill me (yet) for misplacing its cultural origin, that Mau Mau means burning spear (bat!) in Kikuyu.

More here: http://www.leakecarauction.com/CarPics/TULSA01778.jpg. Oops, that's Johnny Cash's car from One Piece at a time.

More about Mau Mau from here: http://www.campusprogram.com/reference/en/wikipedia/m/ma/mau_mau.html

Mmmarkiep - By all means, go right ahead.

I vote for joe-mama

Chairman Mauer!

...or Chairman Mao for short :)

BTW, isn't David Ortiz now known as "Cookie Monster"?

If "The Kid" is taken, I vote for Mau Mau. Provided it's pronouced like cow cow and not like mama or may may.

I can hear it now...There's a man on second with two outs in a tie game that's gone to extra innings. It starts as a whisper among the cheers as he leaves the on deck circle, but, by the time he has reached the batter's box, it has grown to a roaring chant rivaling the loudest calls for Eddie: "Mau Mau! Mau Mau! Mau Mau!" Base hit! The Dome erupts in cheers!

As a matter of fact, I withdraw my previous attempt at a nick name and fully endorse Mau Mau. You can't chant "The Kid" and Mau Mau is more original then MoJo, which gets my second place nod.

I would be honored if Joe Mauer became known as "JoeMa" in the same way that I am "JoePa" to Penn State loyalists.

A certain Chris - an avid Bat-girl follower and semi-regular poster - and I are both San Franisco residents; however, it must be made clear that we left our hearts in the care of Coach John Gagliardi and on the Tootie-Frootie-covered floor of the Malt-O-Meal factory, respectively.

There is a district - an up-and-coming, hip, and unassuming district - called SoMa [South of Market] in San Francisco, which plays host to some of the best medium-priced restaurants and clubs in our fair city. SoMa is your best bet to find a good time with any consistency, and it won't cost you too much money, nor will it tax you emotionally like some of the more uppity areas of this town.

When whispering amongst ourselves - hoping to not call down the Yorkshire pudding disdain of Giants fans or the berserker rage of A's fans - Chris and I refer to Joe Mauer as "JoMa."

It's a metaphor.

I also like to call him "The Truth," because Oooooo, Lawd, that boy's The Truth!

He needs something that will be appropriate for years to come. I'd go for "The Smooth", or "The Stroke" or a combination of the two.

I've heard that they call Vlad "The Freak" in Anaheim.

David Ortiz is known as "Papi" or "Poppy," as well as "Cookie Monster," in Boston.

My favorite Mauer nicknames mentioned so far are "Quickswing," "Mau-Mau" (or "Burning Spear"), and "MoJo."

Or, we could pick up on the common baseball practice of adding an "ee" sound to the end of everybody's name, and refer to Joe as "Maui." Fans could even set up a little beach area in the Upper GA in his honor, and make signs that say "Wowie! Zowie! Maui!" and "Paradise in Maui," or "Surf's Up in Minnesota," etc. It would also give the sound man a good excuse to play "Surfin' Bird" by (Minnesota's own) The Trashmen when Joe comes to the plate, and who wouldn't enjoy that?

It is painfully obvious, and I've been using it since early this afternoon-"The Mauler"It can be used throughout his 19 year career.

Good work, Al. I think "the mauler" is pretty close to perfect. My vote is for Joe "The Mauler" Mauer.

Batgirl, do you think that your going to update the pic's you have of Joe because all of them are like when he is barely legal. He's been a growing boy and he has been legal for like 3 years 2 months and like some "even" days(18);)
Mau-Mau and Quick Swing, I think?, are my favs so far!

I've found it peculiar that only two of the three great childhood cereal ghouls have made these pages. Therefore, let's call Joe FRANKENBERRY to join battery mates Count Chocula and Boo-Berry. Joe's hideous sideburns could soon morph into protuding neck bolts. Surely the BatCave must have the technology to display photos of Joe and everyone's favorite strawberry monster.

I'm liking "QuickSwing" but I propose putting a spin on it, in honor of one of my favorite cartoon characters...

"QuickSwing McMauer"

'Cuz he's so darn nice: Gentleman Joe Mauer

QuickSwing McMauer

HAHAH
brilliant

"Or, we could pick up on the common baseball practice of adding an "ee" sound to the end of everybody's name, and refer to Joe as "Maui." Fans could even set up a little beach area in the Upper GA in his honor, and make signs that say "Wowie! Zowie! Maui!" and "Paradise in Maui," or "Surf's Up in Minnesota," etc. It would also give the sound man a good excuse to play "Surfin' Bird" by (Minnesota's own) The Trashmen when Joe comes to the plate, and who wouldn't enjoy that?"

I would be the first person in line to set up a little island paradise for Mauer in Upper GA. Of course, then someone else would have to start the Florida Retirement Center dedicated to Terry Mulholland on the other side of Upper GA. But I'm sure that could be arranged.

I'm too late for the contest, but I think "Dr. Moxie" is the ticket.

They already sell Maui Wowie smoothies at the dome (big thumbs up for stawberry banana).

Maybe Joe could get an endorsement deal.